"Results Not Typical"

ADDENDA:
I will be starting Culinary School in a few weeks. My work search has come up with a bunch of freelance projects, but no regular gig. I think I'm going to slightly change up this blog - I will still record everything I eat and my feelings around it, but will also focus on the experience of being a culinary student, one who is doing it mid-life rather than as an inexperienced high school graduate. Feel free to email me ideas for a new title! "Kulinary Kicks"? "Konstantly Kooking"? "Kitchen Krazed Klassroom"? Hmmmm....

Weight this morning 230, I suspect I didn't drink enough water. My blood pressure is 131/88, which is a little high, but average for me.

I'm working on the computer and the Food Network is on in the background. The TV commercials are blowing my mind - a show about crappy diner food is sponsored by a stool softener. Queen Latifah blagging some weight loss pill, bragging how much she lost while a small "RESULTS NOT TYPICAL" appears in the corner. Menopause hormone replacement meds during a biography of Julia Child. Yes, we all want to be free...from the need to poop and being a fat-ass!

BREAKFAST: 9am, apple, .25 bowl, hunger 3/5

LUNCH: 1:15pm, shrimp curry with jasmine rice, a couple pieces of nan, onion bahji with chutney, poppadom, water, 2 bowls, hunger 4/5
Midtown lunch with Erikka after taking a meeting in the office. Food was a bit eh, but was really good company - funny how that makes most food more enjoyable.

PM WATERING: 3:30pm, 24 oz freshly made seltzer
Just blew threw almost 2 c-notes at Whole Foods, with about 12 plastic bags full of groceries hanging off of all ends of the bicycle.

DINNER PT 1: 6:30pm, baby spinach salad, lots of shards of shortbread, 2 bowls, hunger 4/5
Made a variation of the baby spinach salad with red bell pepper, radishes, scallion, cuce, carrots and left out the red onion and roasted nuts.

Wanted to use up some old whole wheat pastry flour, so whipped up a batch of short bread while doing laundry. I threw in some vanilla flavoring (which I got by accident - extract is suspended in alcohol, this stuff is in glycerin - not as flavorful) which seemed to alter the dough. Despite refrigerating for 30 minutes, the dough refused to keep any shape and ended up being shapeless flat blobs on the baking pans. Coming out of the oven, they took a wonderful light-brown sheen. On the one hand, they are extremely crumbly and fragile and I ate maybe a half bowl of short bread by picking up the pieces. On the other hand, the short bread is unexpectedly light in the mouth and the good butter I used pleasantly coats the mouth without being overly greasy. I stuck with the recipe's call for confectioner's sugar, but next time I think I'll experiment with brown sugar, get a more caramelized thing going.

I guess I chomped up the beginning and end of a big dinner, maybe I should just skip the middle, see how I feel in a few hours....

DINNER PT 2: 9:30pm, boca burger with pickles on whole wheat toast, 4 pieces of vegetable nori roll, a small handful of short bread, 1.5 bowls, 12 oz seltzer, hunger 4/5
Hunger came knocking, ate more shortbread to cut it off.

Don't Go to Remedy Diner, It Sucks!

ADDENDA:
Slept like a brick last night, solid 11 hours of sleep, first full sleep in a week, feel good. Before eating, hopped on the scale, and the scale says 232, huh. Looking forward to getting a bit more active this week, a bike ride, a yoga class, hopefully an interview or two, some kissin' on my B, some good cookin', some good eatin'...

BP 11:15am: 136/101
Not happy with that number. Got to watch this closely for the next few days.

BRUNCH: Noon, left over clam pie, grape soda, 2.5 bowls, hunger 4/5
The pie reheated excellently in the oven, really made me appreciate how I could never make this at home for two reasons - one, the clams, despite being a day old, still tasted fresher than anything out of a can. Two, the coal-char on the bottom of the pie gives a certain mildly bitter taste to the crusty part of the crust that is such a great contrast to the sweeter chewier parts.

PM SNACK: 6:30pm, baby spinach salad with oo&v, roasted cashews, 1 bowl, hunger 4/5

PM SNACK: 7:15pm, banana, .25 bowl, hunger 4/5
Trying to hold out for when I meet up with B later this eve.

DINNER: 8:45pm, small green salad, 1 piece of whole wheat bread, sauted shrimp in wine sauce over yellow rice and peas, vegan peanutbutter cheesecake, water, 2.5 bowls
Me and B went to a new spot in our hood, Remedy Diner on Houston, and man, did it suck. Beside the cheesy decor and the bad service, the food was kind of badly cooked and came out of the kitchen not as described on the menu. And expensive to boot! We scooted over to Atlas for vegan treats to make up for the lackluster meal, which I now regret because I got a thumping headache from the sugar. Gonna drink some water...

EVENING WATERING: 10:15pm, 24 oz still

Junk Food Armageddon

ADDENDA:
My first summer at summer camp, we had parent's day right in the middle of the month I was away. It was the very first time I was away from my parents, and I struggled with home-sickness for the first week. I was OK for the second, but then my parents visited.

It was a glorious day, and I cried when they left, probably the first time I ever cried for my parents (I was 10). One thing I remember clearly....most of the other campers were from Long Island, and came from much wealthier homes than I did. The camp fed us 3 squares a day, 'family-style', meaning you could as much as you wanted. No one was in need of food. Regardless, other parents would mail their kids all sorts of junk-food which counselors would collect and put into big plastic barrels to keep the animals out.

But when parent's day came, it was JUNK FOOD ARMAGEDDON. Parents would just bring tons of crap to eat all day, take their kids out off campus into the wilds of Pennsylvania to get 'real food', etc. I don't remember what we ate that day, but I do remember a small blue cooler which had some simple things for a light lunch, probably bread and cheese and fruit. My parents never gave me sweets, so it was a huge treat for my mom to give me a plastic baggie full of chocolate chip cookies she made (undoubtedly the recipe off the back of a Nestle's morsel's bag) before they split. I cried, hugged, it was difficult for the three of us.

That evening, the counselors and staff had all the kids take out the huge amount of junk food crap they received that day and put it on the picnic table in the middle of our bunks. Basically, we were told this has to be eaten now, whatever's left thrown away. I had not eaten a single one of my cookies because I wanted to wait till I was hungry and try to make them last for the 2 weeks I had till I saw my parents again. But, it was share and eat and throw away, and I really didn't want to share or throw away, so I took my bag of cookies and ate the whole thing - all these kids had this horrible store-bought cheesy-poof crap in vast quantities, and all I had was my bag of cookies, a little part of my mom right with me. I distinctly remember eating the whole bag, taking a few steps, and chucking my guts out. Wasn't pleasant, but I was glad those stupid kids didn't get any of my cookies, they wouldn't of appreciated them anyway. Still kinda glad.

(When I did a google image search for 'Junk Food Armageddon', this Hulk Hogan pic came up - he was at the height of his popularity when I was arounf 10....)

Brought my Easter candy to the office today, some others also brought theirs in, and put it on the lunch table for whoever to eat. Kinda like the adult version of the parent's day picnic table.

Weighed myself this morning, perhaps not what one is supposed to do the day after Easter dinner, 234. Though others might be disappointed, losing a pound over a few weeks seems right to me. Still, gotta step it up.

BREAKFAST: 8:30am, 1 fuji apple, .5 bowls, hunger 3/5
Feel like I have a food-hangover, but I need to go into a client's to pop out some work, would be foolish to eat nothing.

LUNCH #1: Noon, tomato soup, 1 bowl, hunger 4/5
Swung by B's office and we went to lunch together. Not very hungry and just ordered soup, but once I ate it, it went down my throat fast, guess I was hungrier than I thought.

LUNCH #2: 2:15pm, handful of cocktail shrimp, prime rib sandwich on super hippy bread with b&b pickles, 2 bowl, hunger 4/5
Left overs from last night's feast, 20 seconds in the micro and still tender and juicy and yummy. Matched well with the toughness of the superhippy. Tried the Rick's Picks super-expensive pickles, was good, not as cloyingly sweet like industrial bread n' butters, but still, not a big deal, not worth the money. Guess I'm just not a pickle fanatic.

PM SNACK: 5pm, a headless solid dark chocolate bunny, .5 bowls, hunger 4/5
A little bit too much. Threw out the remainder of the Easter sweets.

DINNER: 8pm, 2 little rice balls, 2 little fried olives, spoonful of eggplant parm, 1 meat ball, gnocchi with sausage in a light cream sauce, about 2 teaspoons worth of various chocolates, 1 glass prosecco, water, 2 bowls, hunger 3/5
Birthday dinner for a close friend at a nice local restaurant, really good vibes. Cupcakes were also distributed, showed a rare restraint because after the tiny bits of fancy chocolates, the last thing I wanted was a cupcake.

Feelin' like a lazy fat cat

ADDENDA:
Not to sound too much like a chick, but I do feel fat. The pants around my belly are tight, my back has been aching a little the past few days and I can't help but think it's because of the weight I'm dragging around. Not been riding my bike at all, no time for getting into the beginning phases of a yoga habit, haven't been to the farmers market in too long. Look forward to getting back in a rhythm.

BREAKFAST: 6am, good yogurt with raw nuts, honey, vanilla, hunger 4/5
House guests arrived in the wee hours, couldn't get back to sleep so I ate and watched the tube. Funny how interrupted sleep can rev the appetite.

AM SNACK: 8am, banana, hunger 4/5

AM WATERING: 10am, 24 oz still

BP: 10:15am, 129/97

LUNCH: 1:30pm, bread with three olive oils, asparagus over mushroom, pancetta and puffy dough, pumpkin & funky cheese raviolis, 1 glass white wine, chocolate soufle with vanilla icecream, 3 small pieces of chocolate, hunger 4/5
Nice holiday lunch at Fig & Olive on 13th street. The HVS forced those three chocolates on me, she almost got violent.

DINNER: 6:30pm, small green salad, assortment of pieces of homemade pizzas, chocolate and mint ice cream, 1 glass presecco, water, hunger 4/5
Cooked up a storm for some house guests, relatives staying with me from Israel. Pizzas came out pretty good this time. Used fresh sweet sopressetta as the featured meat - on the pizza, came out like the perfect alternative to pepperoni - thin so it got crispy on the edges, pleasingly fatty but did not leave pools of grease on the 'za.

234 Pounds o' Fury!!

ADDENDA:
What hath thow raught? Ilsa has a blog!! Here!

Weighed myself this morning, almost forgot, but the scale was in the way (the weigh?) of me retrieving my cell phone. 234. Was wearing pants, and just ate breakfast, so it's probably closer to my standard 230. Not feeling very furious, but anything that is tagged with "o' Fury!!" sounds less blubbery.

Feel weird about the pint of soy icecream I snarfed last night. On one hand, I think I enjoyed and appreciated it more than I would of if it was a regular habit. On the other hand, my lust for it immediately following my substandard home meal was overpowering in a way. Ilsa's blog suggests brushing teeth to get the stomach-body-brain signals to shout "done!" to the lust impulses. May just try that.

BREAKFAST: 8am, organic chex with good milk, banana, hunger 3/5
Start the sweets off right.

AM WATERING: 9:30am, 24 oz still

BP 9:45am: 132/90

LUNCH: 12:30pm, homemade hummus, carrot sticks, cucumber slices, 2 slices normal wholewheat bread, 2 slices weird dense superGerman "bread", 3 pieces sesame tofu, hunger 4/5
Out of superhippy bread from the farmer's market, so I got this weird, dense block of bread-like material imported from Germany, full of whole grains, weirdly moist, and shelf-stable for months in the unopened wrapper.

Hummus was good, needs more cumin. Next batch is going to rock. Hard. My dad never had the secret weapon of the roasted garlic, damn I wish I could share that with him. I think he'd be impressed. After tasting it, he'd nod, and say something quietly, like, "Noah, that's pretty good. I wish I thought of that." A small grin was like a hug from him (though in later years I subjected him to more unasked-for hugs than I can count.)

PM SNACK: 4:15pm, apple & raw funki havarti, hunger 3/5
Apple was mushy, May have to run out and grab another snack, as I have a knife skills class 6:30-10 tonight.

PM SNACK: 5:15pm, lamb on pita, hunger 4/5
As I'm eating this, I'm thinking, "This is not going to help me lose weight, is it?"

PM SNACK: 7pmish, carrots sticks & inferior hummus, small handful of olives, lemony water, hunger 4/5
Snacks during class

DINNER: 9:30pm, yummy carrot soup, quinoa with orange supreme, white bean thingy, sauteed broccoli with mushrooms, roasted cubed potatoes, hunger 4/5
Dinner was made with all the veg that the students prepped in knife skills class, all vegan, the HVS would of been proud. Food was actually pretty good, but could of used some sort of protein for satiety's sake.

Back On It

ADDENDA:
Meant to weigh myself this morning but forgot. I tend to forget things I have no interest in/really don't want to do. Looking forward to getting back into healthier eating habits. Before it was new and a little struggling, now it's starting to be the new routine. Brought an apple & stinky cheese to work, not because I'm on a sugar fast, but because it's damn yummy...

BREAKFAST: 7:30am, good yogurt with honey & vanilla & raw nuts, hunger 2/5

AM WATERING: 9:15am, 24 oz still

BP: 9:30am, 130/93

LUNCH: 1pm, small pastrami sandwich with pea soup, slaw & pickles, water, hunger 4/5
Satisfying sit-down at Junior's around the corner on a rainy day. Reading the beginning chapter's of 'The Omivore's Delimma', oy, how corn is a vessel so we can all eat fossil fuel in many different foodstuffs, including the beef I just ate.

PM SNACK: 4:45, apple and funky-ass raw cheese, hunger 3/5
Funny how stinky cheese becomes yummy with a good apple.

DINNER: 7pm, shrimp in a wine sauce with mushrooms and onions, wild rice, almost a full pint of chocolate mint soy icecream, hunger 4/5
Made another pound of shrimp, threw in wine and veg and high-heat safflower oil into the wok. Definitely better than the last time, but still not....very good. I'm missing something or a step, may have to read a recipe. Cooked this weird black long-grain wild rice with low-sodium organic chicken broth, come out kinda crunchy and unappealing. So when I was finished with the meal, just felt unsatisfied, but I was glad there was no more gelato in the house....uh oh. I had soy icecream in the house, to feed the HVS at the last pizza-blowout. Well, I hadn't inhaled a pint of icecream in such a long time, so I did it. I ate it in front of the TV. The soy icecream itself wasn't so great, but the sitting, the leisurely eating of it, the wave of satisfaction, it was mmmmmm. Figured hey, I'm not a robot, this is an uncommon indulgence, and you better not make a habit of this or I'll have to dislocate my leg and kick my own ass....