I tried to, but he was closed

B got me this book, and it's the first book in quite a while that from the moment I picked it up, I couldn't put it down until the last page -- not a typical response to a cook book, but this isn't just a cook book, more like a mash-up of cookbook, both memoir and screed of a very skewed but cool philosophy of food and life. Shopsin is a self-invented master cook and master of his small but soulful restaurant space; he personal cooked up a menu of over 900 items. He's famous for things like his pancakes, which he proudly states that he uses frozen Aunt Jemima pancake batter, because he used to make it from scratch...but this stuff is just as good so why bother?! He loves being a contrarian, something I can get with.

Some basic things I've extracted from culinary school he discovered for himself, and took that knowlege in very odd, creative directions. Part of the reason for his large menu, he claims, is that he doesn't measure anything, and no dish ever comes out the same twice -- he'd rather a customer order different things every time so he's not responsible for consistency.

In recent years he's moved operations to a stall in the Essex Market, which happens to be about a 10 minute walk from my front door. I zipped over there for lunch, but...he's closed Mondays, according to his website! Drat! He has 5 kids, now all adults, and wrote a lot about raising them in the restaurant. In the book, he also discussed why he had kids: it's an excuse to live your life a 2nd time with out the falseness of nostalgia.

ADDENDA
Weird, I'm losing weight, feel healthy and positive, and yet I'm worried that I'm eating way too many sweets lately. This morning I was 221.8 pounds, I don't think I've ever lost weight while not pro-actively trying to lose it. I'd say, baaaah, I'll probably gain it back in a week or something, but I'm seeing Ilsa tomorrow and don't want her to scold me for my fat-person way of thinking. My secret plan is to feed her lots of pumpkin pie until she weighs more than me.

BREAKFAST: 10:15am, organic cornflakes with good milk, banana, 1 bowl, hunger 4/5

LUNCH: 1:30, spring rolls, mashed taro treasure boxes, mock shrimp in rice paper, mini steamed rice in lotus leaf, 1.25 bowl, hunger 4/5
Since Shopsins was not available, made it to Chinatown for some vegetarian dim sum.

PM SNACK: 4:15pm, 2 homemade chocolate chip cookies, .25 bowl, hunge 4/5

PM SNACK: 6pm, boca burger on rye, small portion of rice and beans, .75 bowl, hunger 4/5
Got hungry waiting for B to show up.

DINNER: 7:45pm, hot italian sausage cooked in homemade kraut and cider, 1 homemade chocolate chip cookie with ice cream, 1 bowl, hunger 2/5
Sauteed onion and apple before searing the sausage. Still, didn't enjoy it that much because just wasn't hungry enough.

From glaze to caramel

On Saturday, Chef R asked me to make glaze for the scones she was baking. I took equal parts sugar and butter and stirred them in a sauce pot over heat. When the sugar finally dissolved in the butter, it started to brown. I turned off the heat and walked away. About twenty minutes later, Chef R asked me, is it supposed to be that brown? I went back and looked, and the whole thing congealed into one blob with clarified butter floating on top, and it turned a deep dark mahogany brown. I stuck a spoon in and tasted it -- it was thick, viscous, nutty, a delicious but poorly made caramel. As I learned in c-school, if I hadn't stirred it so much and dosed it with a drop of corn syrup, it would have been silky smooth caramel. Mine had lots of gritty sugar crystal in it.

So I made it again, with 2x more butter than sugar, and whisked it on a lower heat until the sugar crystals dissolved. All was well with the scone world.

ADDENDA:
My apprenticeship ended on Saturday. I came in on Sunday for a token payment, and Chef R will be talking to the owner this week about future arrangements. We'll see.

B was feeling frisky this morning and made french toast. I have some horrible memories of my mom making french toast. Thin dense crumbly Arnold white bread dipped in some roughly beaten eggs then fried at a high temperature in margarine in a non-stick pan. Deeeesgusting. So I arm-chair quarterbacked B as she cooked.

B's instinct was to go for the whole wheat bread in the freezer, but I insisted on her using the spare challah rolls from Thanksgiving. We happen to have the PERFECT french toast bread on hand, why not use it? Take eggs, whisk equal parts milk (because we didn't have cream), sweeten with sugar (we used brown sugar), dash of salt, cinnamon. Preheat heavy bottomed skillet, butter generously, preheat oven. Dip thick-sliced challah in batter, cook on medium heat. At the flip, I told her to place the whole pan in the oven, but she didn't believe me. So she cooked the 2nd side, and liked it just fine. Out of annoyance, I got up, cooked a second batch, then finished them in the oven; they came out crisper on the outside, firmer and more custard-like in the middle, and despite my life-long aversion to french toast, really enjoyed it (and the cranky process of cooking with my sweet wife).

In a good mood after the shop, I swung by the market on the way home and made B a faux-Mexican meal. First step, made sofrito - sauteed minced onion, green pepper, garlic, and a little jalapeno to soft in olive oil. Threw in chicken stock, brown rice, black beans, and half the sofrito in the rice cooker. The other half of the sofrito I mixed with lemon juice and sauteed fresh butterflied shrimp in. B made a crude guacamole today, which I finished with lemon and salt, and spread it on a whole wheat tortilla wedge with jack cheese, and put in the broiler on an oiled sheet pan.

While all this was happening, I knocked out a batch of chocolate chip cookies, this time using three vanilla beans instead of extract -- oh man, these cookies just hit the next level of cookiedom.

SATURDAY
BREAKFAST: 5:30am, 2 waffles, .5 bowl, hunger 4/5

AM SNACK: 10:30am, donut from donut plant, .25 bowl, hunger 4/5
Had the 'creme brulee' donut, a new thing that is more of a small cream puff, vanilla custard and a slightly crunchy top, really good.

AM-PM SNACK: 11-1pm, equivalent of 1.5 donuts, .5 bowl, hunger 4/5
Brought donuts in to the shop, just in case this was my last day -- one of those things that were talked about, would of been a shame if I never followed through, I hate insincere people.

DINNER: 5:30pm, pad see ew, thai salad, water, 1.5 bowl, hunger 4/5
Crappy Thai food with the B.

EVENING SNACK: 6:15pm, oversalted popcorn, some peanut m&ms, water, .5 bowl, hunger 4/5

SUNDAY
BREAKFAST: 9:45pm, B-made french toast, .75 bowl, hunger 4/5

LUNCH: 12:30pm, slice with caramelized onion, mushroom and parm, root beer, 1 bowl, hunger 4/5

PM SNACK: 3pm, chocolate chip scone, .5 bowl, hunger 4/5

PM SNACK: 6:15pm, chocolate chip cookie dough batter, half a cookie, .25 bowl, hunger 4/5


DINNER: 7:15pm, sofrito shrimp with guacamole quesadilla and rice & beans, ginger ale, chocolate chip cookies with B&J organic vanilla ice cream, 1.5 bowl, hunger 4/5

Pita Pizza

The 5 trays of dough held over to age were made two days ago (instead of one, since the restaurant was closed over Thanksgiving). To test the flavor, Chef R and I stretched a dough partially and popped it in the oven. Because there was no topping on it at all, and no docking or pricking, the thing swelled up just like a pita -- after all, the word 'pizza' is a derivative of that much older word. Funny to see such a direct illustration. The bread was more tangy and yeasty, but still very appealing.

According to Chef R, the day after Thanksgiving was very busy, but by 8pm (usually the beginning of the rush), business trickled to a halt and Chef R even called the house phone just to test to make sure it was working. I left three hours early.

ADDENDA:
I still haven't been given a straight answer if I'll be continuing after tomorrow. I'm definitely not feeling like a particularly valued member of the team -- I guess the future will be written tomorrow, as my externship hours for c-school will be complete.

BREAKFAST: 11:15am, organic chex with good milk, .75 bowl, hunger 4/5
Woke up late, with less than hour to get out to the restaurant.

PM SNACK: 3:30pm, flourless chocolate cake, .25 bowl, hunger 4/5

LUNCH: 5:30pm, slice with onion and mushroom, rootbeer, 1 bowl, hunger 4/5

DINNER: 9pm, pizza with moz, thin sliced red potatoes, parm, caramelized onions, sausage, rosemary, black pepper, soda, 1.25 bowl, hunger 4/5

EVENING WATERING: 11pm, quart

Gahwil Gahwil

Thanksgiving, what a great holiday -- you're supposed to cook/eat a homemade feat, and be with your family and/or bestest friends. At B's aunt's house, we were closer to the second rule than the 1st rule, but what are ya gonna do. My pumpkin pie was finished, despite the presence of two other pies and a cake. I spent the morning making two trays of stuffing, based on the methodology of this recipe. When reheated, it got a little dry despite being covered in foil -- next time I'm going to up the stock-content, and throw in a good lump of butter, too. The challah stuffing went, and about half the sausage--Jews just ain't down with the pork sausage.

Growing up, the Jewish holidays were shared amongst the different aunts and uncles; but Thanksgiving was just ours. My mom was in charge, though it was up to my dad to do most of the cooking. Mom did a lot of prep, baking potatoes and other things difficult to mess up. My dad did the turkey, crudites, salad, steamed green beans and garlic, roasted chestnuts. And of course, my mom put me 'in charge' of the stuffing, which was dumping a box of Stouffer's turkey-flavored stuffing mix into hot water with butter melted in it. Even then, I was vaguely embarrassed when my mom would say that I 'made' the stuffing.

ADDENDA:
The South American pasta chef at the restaurant pronounces gobble gobble as "GAHwil GAHwil". I don't know why, it just sounded incredibly cool. I wonder if South American turkeys have crazy accents, too.

AM WATERING: 7:30am, pint of water

NOON SNACK: small plate of two stuffings, pint of black cherry and orange soda, 1 bowl, hunger 4/5
Can't serve something without tasting it first! Like the rye-sausage more than the challah, firmer texture and bolder pronounced flavor.

DINNER: 4:30pm, plate of sliced turkey breast and yellow gravy, steamed carrots, small green salad, sausage and challah stuffing, mashed potatoes, small piece of cake, water, 1.5 bowl, hunger 4/5
Other than a larger portion of stuffing than usual, did not pig out at all. The mashed potatoes were excellent, the person who made them following a restaurant recipe involving stock, roasted garlic and butter.

EVENING SNACK: 9:30pm, slice of pizza, .5 bowl, hunger 4/5
Feeling nippy, brought home old slices from the shop.

Death by Chocolate, literally

It was just Chef R and me today, because despite expectations of a busy evening, Chefs A and C were out of town. I made the dough single-handedly for the first time today, and made the mistake of lifting and carrying 24kg of dough to my stations -- my back is not happy. No desserts to be made, helped Chef R process veg for a spinach-kale-polenta soup. And then there was the block of dark chocolate.

We use solid dark chocolate in a flourless chocolate cake and hot chocolate -- which becomes kick-ass chocolate pudding after a few days. The chocolate comes in an 11 pound block that needs to be broken up into small enough pieces to be scaled out with relative accuracy. The block goes on a cutting board, then you take a pointed wide metal thing (I think it's a repurposed cheese-board cutter) to wedge yourself in and jiggle back and forth until the chocolate snaps. After about half the block got broken up, I discovered that you can see the grain of the chocolate on its underside -- by going with the direction of the grain, the stuff breaks like slate. Before I discovered that, I was really forcing it to make it go quickly and slipped and jabbed myself pretty strongly in the gut. Despite getting myself with the point, only left a slight bruise, no breaking of the skin. 'Death by chocolate,' I snorted, and kept moving.

ADDENDA:
An intense day. Had an interview for a corporate job in my old career in graphics this morning, went well, but was exhausted from waking early. I brought up to Chef R that, come Saturday, I would have completed my hours for the externship. Her comment off the bat was, "I'll speak to the owner," not, "I love you Norbert, we'll pay you whatever you want per hour, just don't leave us!" Speak to the owner, the same owner who accused me of destroying his very expensive prosciutto yesterday. Oy. After the busy night, Chef R mentioned she'll be talking to Chef A soon, and at the least she'll try to get me a wage for weekend prep shifts....we'll see.

BREAKFAST: 7:30am, organic chex with good milk, .5 bowl, hunger 2/5

AM SNACK: 11:45am, chocolate rugelah, water, .5 bowl, hunger 4/5

LUNCH: 6pm, 2 slices, root beer, 1.25 bowl, hunter 4.5

PM DRUGGING: 8pm, 2 Advil, water
Height of dinner service and I got a thumping headache, an aching back, a sore stretching arm. Still fun as hell, though.

PM SNACKS: 7-9pm, 2 slices of pizza, quart of water
Grabbing as the rush went along

DINNER: 9:30pm, spaghetti and meatballs, 2 sodas, 2 bowl, hunger 4/5
The pastas are too large, and too salty. I could hear my c-school teacher Chef Allen moaning in my ear.

EVENING SNORT: 11:30pm, 1 beer

Pies at home, then Pies at work

Spent the evening with Chef C, as Chef A has taken off for break and Chef R couldn't come in. It was an uneventful and well-run time at the pizza station, except for when the owner came in and yelled at me for improperly slicing the prosciutto. Granted, I was a little sloppy, but only from inexperience -- not from not trying or not caring. He used a few harsh words and made me wonder if I really want to work for this person. He can't fire me, because he hasn't hired me, and my apprenticeship hours are up on Saturday.

Chef C assured me that no one can work at this place for any period of time without the owner freaking out at least once, and that I shouldn't worry about it. Everyone who slices the cured meats screws it up the first few times. Regardless, here I am doing the owner a favor by coming in to cover a shift with less than 24 hours notice -- for free -- because there is literally no one else to do it, and here he is treating me like a 'tard. Lucky for him, my years of dealing with a-holes at work has given me a thick skin. Rather than lashing out, I just moan about it on my blog!

After that, I chilled with Rufus. He's my wonder-cat:


ADDENDA:
Spent the early morning at the supermarket, stocking up for Thanksgiving cooking. Made oatmeal-peanut butter bars for B's tummy and a couple of pumpkin pies for the holiday. Rushed through it, forgot a few details, hope it comes out OK.

Went to the kosher bakery around the corner to pick up breads to make stuffing. The old Eastern European woman behind the counter unprompted suggested making stuffing from the challah rolls, and told me her recipe -- stale the bread, run through a meat grinder, throw in some diced onions and peppers, mix in a couple of eggs, stuff in the bird. If it's too dry, add some water. Bim bam boom. My stuffing won't be that different in theory, but with a mushroom-chicken stock, the vegetables roasted before mixing with the bread, and the bread toasted instead of staled. And I'm still contemplating the seasoning and herb mix....

BREAKFAST: 7:45am, one chocolate donut from donut plant, .5 bowl, hunger 4/5
Tired, the hunger that comes from too little sleep. On the way to the supermarket to pick up ingredients for assorted Thanksgiving things, thought it unwise to go on an empty stomach.

LUNCH: 2pm, vegan cesar salad, tempeh, quineoa and steamed kale with tahini, water, 1.5 bowl, hunger 4/5
Snickle snacking with the HVS after yoga. Hadn't eaten this healthfully in a long time, and on the bike ride home my stomach was a bit queasy -- was it the crazy nutrients overwhelming my system, or just a lack of water?

PM SNACK: 3:30pm, 5 pieces of chocolate rugelah, quart of water, .5 bowl, hunger 4/5

DINNER: 6:30pm, 1 slice, root beer, 1 bowl, hunger 4/5

EVENING SNACK: 9pm, chocolate pudding, .5 bowl, hunger 4/5
Real chocolate pudding, none of that from-a-mix nonsense. Milk, dark chocolate, cocoa, corn starch and a dash of salt. Dead simple, deep and lush. Mmmmmm.

EVENING WATERING: 11pm, quart of water

Watch them fingers

I had a lot of opportunities to slice off fingers this evening. I sliced up a bunch of waxy potatoes for the special pizza, and at one point in the evening was sent across the street to our sister restaurant (which is closed on Mondays) to use the slicer to make pepperoni and prosciutto. Making the sausage the proper shape and thickness was no big deal, but this was my first time cutting the prosciutto.

The thing is a large ham hock with dark red cured meat wrapped in fat and dry outer skin that needs to be hacked off before slicing. For purposes of laying on a pizza after it comes out of the oven, the meat needs to be paper thin, like a cell-worth of thickness. When it hits the pie, the fat needs to turn to jelly and the meat needs to loosen, almost like a meat-flavoring on the pie rather than a big textural wallop. I found this difficult to achieve until I was near the end. It seems you need to set the slicer to obscenely thin, then press the meat actively against it. Any other way will either come out clownishly thick or will deliver small, partial slices.

A lot of compliments on the soup from everyone today, including a few customers. Chef A chose the ingredients, but it was I who actually went to market to buy the ingredients (and choose the quantities), cooked the veg, processed the soup and seasoned it. So yeah, my ego is stroked, thank you very much!

Due to the upcoming vacation, I've been asked to come in Tuesday and Wednesday. Looks like my apprenticeship may be over as soon as Saturday. After that, they're going to either have to take me off the schedule or pay me the big bucks....

ADDENDA:
Weighed in at 223, about the same, a little less. I know Ilsa will be annoyed, but I can't help but be a little surprised that I'm maintaining my lower weight without trying, even in the least. It's not that I'm unhappy about it, I'm thrilled, I'm just used to yo-yo-ing a bit in my younger years and am used to the other shoe dropping by now.

B is like a space heater, radiating baby-heat and feeling warm despite turning off the heat, opening windows and sleeping without a blanket. It's kinda cool.

BREAKFAST: 12:30, toasted whole wheat bagel with good butter, banana, 1 bowl, hunger 4/5

LUNCH: 4:30pm, 1 slice, ginger ale, 1 bowl, hunger 4/5

PM SNACK:7pm, 1 soda

DINNER: 9:30pm, mushroom rigatoni, soda, chocolate cake, 1.5 bowl, hunger 4/5

Rutabaga!!

On Saturday, I soup-chopped a variety of seasonal veg, and on Sunday, I chopped the more delicate veg and cooked it all down, blended and strained, then seasoned what became an apple-squash-rutabaga soup. Chef A just kind of let me go at with only a list of ingredients and ratios at the beginning, then tasted it a few times while I was finishing with cream, cayenne, maple syrup and salt.

Rutabaga is one freaky vegetable, like a turnip on steroids, poised to beat the crap out of any other vegetable on the table. It smells sharp but pleasant, adding a nice harmonizing tone to the soup.

ADDENDA:
Saturday and Sunday nights, went out to just-OK restaurants with friends. Amazing how friends came make bleah food fun.

SATURDAY
BREAKFAST: 9:15am, 2 frozen waffles, glass of cider, 1.25 bowl, hunger 4/5
Fresh cider is magically delicious.

LUNCH: 11:30am, mini pizza with tomato sauce, caramelized onions and grated cheeses, chocolate cake, 1 bowl, hunger 4/5

PM SNACK: 4:30pm, 1 slice of pizza, orange soda, 1 bowl, hunger 4/5

DINNER: 6:30pm, so-called shish kebab with grilled veg, rice, salad, 1 beer, 1.5 bowl, hunger 3/5
Went to a restaurant with B and friends before a show, very nice setting but horrible faux-Mediterranean food. The meat was all wrong, too salty, underspiced, overcooked, dry and not even cooked on a skewer. One of those meals that's totally great because of the company, not the food.

EVENING SNACK: 11pm, organic cheesy poofs, .5 bowl, hunger 4/5

SUNDAY
BREAKFAST: 9:30am, good yogurt with honey and vanilla, 1 bowl, hunger 3/5

LUNCH: 3pm, potato, moz, parm, caramelized onion and rosemary pizza, rootbeer, cheesecake, water, 1.75 bowl, hunger 4/5

DINNER: 6:30pm, 1 curry puff, pad see ew with shrimp, water, 1.5 bowls, hunger 3/5

Ohhh, baby baby!

Now that the cat is out of the bag (and like my wondercat Rufus, not sure whether it's a boy or a girl), I can confess when anything food-related sends me on a baby-related line of thinking. Last week, a man came in with a 4 year old daughter, both sat facing each other, each ordered one slice of pizza, he got a red wine, she got a soda. I swooned at the thought of someday having a tea party-like pizza experience with my mini-me.

Today at the restaurant I made mini-tart shells during prep for an off-the-menu dessert. On Sunday afternoon, a waitress is hosting a baby-shower of a friend at the restaurant for about a dozen women. Chef R is making a 'baby' version of the pie nut tart and chocolate pudding tarts. I thought, "Jeez, I thought I'd have to stretch a little to somehow talk about babies and the restaurant!"

The night went well, not crazy busy but busier than last Friday. I've been asked to come in the day before Thanksgiving, as the day before and after tend to be unusually busy in restaurants.

ADDENDA:
Started the day off with a proper breakfast, haven't been doing that enough lately. Gotta get on that.

BREAKFAST: 11am, banana, everything bagel with humus, 1 bowl, hunger 4/5

LUNCH: 4pm, mini margarita pizza with pancetta, flourless chocolate cake, 1 bowl, hunger 4/5

PM SNACK: 8pm, black cherry soda, .5 bowl, hunger 4/5

DINNER: 10:30pm, mac-and-cheese-like pasta, 2 meatballs, cheesecake, water, 1.5 bowl, hunger 4/5
The pasta special was basically chopped rigatoni with melted moz, provolone, butter, bread crumbs and pancetta, maybe a tang of nutmeg, not as good as it should of been. Needs some bechamel to really amplify the cheeses.

Learning to Feed

Wifey's got a bun in the oven! Truth be told, I started this blog a bit after the time I found out, but could not say anything because, y'know, wouldn't have been appropriate. Learning to feed the little bugger, it'll be a challenge.

I've told most of my friends, but it you're a friend whose finding out from this blog, my apologies. If you are a friend of B's, well, call her!

A lot more to ruminate on this subject, obviously, but I think I'll take it slow.

ADDENDA:
To think, I cooked a fantastic dinner almost from scratch (B is repulsed by the idea of sausage making equipment), and it's been demoted to addenda. That's what a baby'll do to ya.

BREAKFAST: 10:30am, good yogurt with honey, vanilla, cashews, .75 bowl, hunger 4/5
Haven't had this healthy breakfast in a while, felt good.

AFTERNOON DRUGGING: 12:15pm, 2 Tylenol
Thumping headache. Got 12 hours sleep last night. Could be related?

LUNCH: 2pm, baby spinach salad with oil & vinegar, butternut squash soup, organic cheesy poofs, 1.5 bowl, hunger 4/5
Had to make and eat salad, or toss the stuff because it'll go bad in a few days. Simple salad, baby spinach, grated carrot, diced cucumber and red onion, dressed with olive oil, balsamic and sea salt. Ate the soup with Garden of Eating puffed cheese doodles, not that great but a good crunch compliment to blender soup.

PM SNACK: 3:30pm, 1 small lump of cookie dough, one freshly baked peanut butter chocolate chip cookie, .25 bowl, hunger 3/5
Made cookies for the wifey when she gets home. My headache receded greatly when I ate this, which makes me think it's sugar related. Hmmmm.

PM SNACK: 5pm, 2 cookies, .25 bowls, hunger 4/5
They wouldn't fit in the cookie jar! They had to be eaten!

DINNER: 7pm, garlic pork sausage poached in cider and kraut, 1 cookie, 1.5 bowl, hunger 4/5
Browned the fresh sausage from Whole Foods in peanut oil, then considered what to cook it in. Had all this fresh fermented kraut, salty and tangy, needs sweetness. Thought of peeling and cooking in an apple, then saw the fresh quart of cider in the fridge! Ahh! Liquid and sweetness and appliness all in one! Through in the kraut and cider, covered, and simmered for an hour, a shallow poach in c-school language. Came out surprisingly well, the funkiness of the stinky kraut brought into mild range with cooking and sweetening, a slight apply taste. The sausage was well done but still juicy.

Museum food

Good casual day out of the house, no cooking. Went to the 'Climate Change' exhibit at the Museum of Natural History in the morning with the HVS, an interesting and informative display. Other than the hordes of teenage students making noise and getting in the way, the what got my goat was the commentary about food in relation to the subject. Under 'considering food choices', it included 'transportation' and 'eat more fruit and veg,' but did not explicitly say 'eat less animal product' or more importantly, 'EAT LESS'. I guess if you're going to suggest personal choices to solve a social problem, you don't want to alienate your audience by suggesting solutions that might be more difficult than previously thought. If food is going to get into proper perspective for a healthy planet, we're all going to have to pay more for less. In my humble opinion!

BREAKFAST: 8:30am, 3 peanut butter chocolate chip cookies, water, .25 bowl, hunger 3/5

AM SNACK: 11:30am, dirty water dog, kraut mustard & onion, .5 bowl, hunger 4/5
In front of the Natural History Museum, hungry and no other options. Haven't had one of these in a long, long time and was surprised how....bland it was. A hot dog is basically lips and buttholes ground up into a paste, then a ton of fat and salt is added to it to give flavor. This dog was a big crumbly, not particularly moist and flavorless. If I'm going to eat something so unhealthy, it should at least taste good. What I tasted was mostly condiments -- it could of been a soy dog, I wouldn't of tasted much of a difference.

PM SNACK: 2pm, square Sicilian 2boots slice, .5 bowl, hunger 4/5
Quick slice on the run, not very good, but 2Boots usually isn't.

LATE AFTERNOON MEAL: 4:45pm, large falafel sandwich on laffa bread, a few sips of peach drink, 1.25 bowl, hunger 4/5
Dinner with wifey at a hole in the wall Israeli falafel joint on 12th and University. Cheap, but too much food that's so heavy.

EVENING SNACK: 7pm, pint of Ben & Jerry's Creme Brulee Ice Cream, 1.25 bowl, hunger 4/5
Oy. I went in with the intention of eating half and I blinked and it was gone! Tomorrow needs to be better. No point in beating myself up now. Perhaps I didn't eat enough beforehand.

Half a face

Eating with a mouth and face that is numb on one side is revelatory. About an hour after coming out of root canal surgery which involved not 1, not 2, not 3, but 4 injections of numbing chemicals to my mouth, I sat down in front of the TV in a comfortable position and ate a pint of Ben & Jerry's chocolate fudge brown ice cream. It's a familiar and monochromatic flavor, with the texture broken up with the fudgey brownie bits and slightly more caramelized and salty tones in it.

On my left side, I felt the smoothness, cold, sweet, chocolaty, density, a certain give of the ice cream and firmness of brownie. On the right side, the sensations tapered off into blankness, like all the words on the right side of the page were erased. The tension of the skin on my face indicated that part of the mouth was full, as was the resistance that my jaw pushed through, but it just....wasn't there. I sat there and really focused on what I was eating. It tasted good, but not....as fresh as the chocolate ice cream I made a week or so ago. I feel like I tasted Ben & Jerry's chocolate fudge brownie ice cream for the first time.

BREAKFAST: 10am, 8 mixed fried perogies with sauteed onion, water, 1.5 bowl, hunger 4/5

I thought they'd be boiled then sauteed to form a little crust, these were deep fried and a little tough and chewy. Still, fun to eat all the left over side dishes of a Polish restaurant on one plate. Creamed spinach in one, kasha in another, a wallop of stewed kraut in a third, a pillow of crumbly but moist meat here, a smear of sweet potato there.

PM SNACK: 4:30pm, apple, .25 bowl, hunger 4/5

About to see Ilsa, assuaging a little bit of guilt with some fruit.

DINNER: 7:15pm, fried spring roll, beef masamam curry with sticky and jasmine rice, 2 bowls, hunger 4/5

EVENING SNACK: 9:15pm, 2 peanut butter chocolate chip cookies, .25 bowl
Spending the evening in with wifey, somehow we ended up spontaneously baking cookies.

Problems with Maws

Look into the deep dark maw of the pizza oven. It goes long, maybe 7 feet to the back of it, and the stone floor, walls and ceilings allow for no lights. At height times, it can fit 12 pies comfortably (and there are two ovens), but beyond the first row they are bathed in darkness. If a pie in the back looks lightly browned, you need to pull it immediately because it'll probably be very dark brown -- still good, but not a lot of time before it starts blackening, given a burnt bitter flavor.

ADDENDA:
Ate really poorly on Saturday, eating to emotions, then feeling crappy from eating crappy, reinforcing said emotions. By the evening, had insomnia for the first time in a while, which lead to grazing in the kitchen, avoiding all the healthier options on hand.

Early Monday morning, the filling I had put in early last week started killing me. As of noon Monday, I am scheduled for an emergency root canal at 2pm. Therefore, this blog will be dark for a few days.

SATURDAY:
BREAKFAST: 9:30am, 1 apple, 1 slice apple pie, 1 bowl, hunger 4/5 The apple was very unsatisfying.

LUNCH: 12pm, small pizza with moz, pancetta, mushrooms, caramelized onions, parm, root beer, chocolate cake, 1.5 bowl, hunger 4/5

DINNER: 4:45pm, meat tortellini in meat sauce, water, 1.5 bowl, hunger 3/5

EVENING SNACK: 6:30, half a slice, black cherry & lemon soda, .75 bowl, hunger 2/5 Brought home some slices for B and ate with her though not very hungry.

EVENING BINGE: 11pm-2am, nibbles of chocolate chips, flax corn chips, .75 bowl, hunger 3/5

SUNDAY
BREAKFAST: 8:30am, good granola with good milk, 1 bowl, hunger 3/5

LUNCH: 2pm, bowl of butternut squash soup, 1 bowl, hunger 4/5
Slurped this down after a nice early afternoon nap.

PM NOSHING: 3-9pm, hors d'eurves including beef wraps, tuna tar tar, mushroom quiche, chicken on focaccia, pigs in blankets, 4 cup cakes, 2 Bellinis, water, 2 bowls, hunger 4/5
Weird eating slowly over a long period.

You will eat garbage, and enjoy it.

During prep, I cleaned, blanched, sauteed and chopped a whole mess of beet and carrot greens to be used in the vegetarian baked eggs dish for the weekend's brunch. These greens were picked up from the farmer's market...for free. Customers ask for these to be removed, because they don't know what to do with them. They are bitter but flavorful dark greens that if cooked properly, are like any spinach or mustard green but pack a bigger wallop of flavor. Hey, if we didn't serve it in the eggs, it would go in the trash. And they're organic and local....

The restaurant was a bit slow, and I was offered an early exit, but I stuck around and got to top a few pizzas in the slower later evening. Made a bunch of mistakes -- mostly, if you bring a wet sauce to the edge of the dough, it WILL stick to the peel. If the dough sits on the peel for more than a few minutes, it will absorb the dry flour you laid down and WILL stick. Indeed, a pizza became a calzone by mistake.

ADDENDA:
Spent the morning cooking butternut squash soup for a dinner party tomorrow evening. Roasted the squash, boiled carrots and white potato in vegetable stock, and sauteed onions with apple. Weird looking at sauteing apples and onion, but it all gets blended in soup.

BREAKFAST: 10am, good granola with good milk, .75 bowl, hunger 4/5

AM SNACK: 11am, freshly made butternut squash soup, 1 bowl, hunger 4/5
As I was tasting and adjusting, it got better and better. After salt, a little cayenne, butter and heavy cream, the sweetness of the sauteed apple really receded. So I put in a blob of molasses and....HOLY MOLEY!! I was immediately compelled to slurp up a bowl.

PM SNACK: 4pm, cold meat ball, cheesecake, water, 1 bowl, hunger 4/5

PM SNACK: 8pm, 1 slice pizza, .75 bowl, hunger 4/5

DINNER: 10:15pm, pizza with moz, roasted peppers, sausage, blackcherry and orange soda, 1.5 bowl, hunger 4/5

Evil at the Supermarket

OK, are you "Extra Rich" or "Light"? Tallest midget? Shortest giant? Or are you ice milk with a whole lot of fillers, chemicals, and nasty sh@t that'll fool the tongue and make you fat anyway?

Had a filling replaced today, so I couldn't eat anything other than ice cream most of the day, and had to eat dinner with the left side of my mouth.

ADDENDA:
Went to another yoga class today, this time Bikram -- in a hot-ass room. Weird. Was dizzy and had to lie down for the final third of the class. Not sure if I like it or not yet.

BREAKFAST: 9am, good granola with good milk, .75 bowl, hunger 3/5

LUNCH: 2:30pm, pint of Haagen Daazz chocolate peanut butter ice cream, 1.25 bowl, hunger 4/5

BIKRAM WATERING: 6-8pm, 2 quarts

DINNER: 8:30pm, half a large Ethiopian vegetarian plate with lots of injera, water, 1.5 bowl, hunger 4/5

EVENING SNACK: 10:30pm, 1 small nutmeg 'chocopod'
I never thought that chocolate and nutmeg would be a good flavor combination, and now that I had a nutmeg-flavored piece of chocolate, I KNOW it's not a good combination. Blech.

Kraut Rock!

Today, I made raw kraut for the HVS with this recipe. It was pretty straightforward: chop up 5 pounds of cabbage (I used a mandolin), some optional veg (thinly sliced carrots), salt generously, and mix. Place into a plastic bucket, top with a plate and some weights to compress. Cover with a towel to keep out dust and ephemera. Wait 7 days, periodically checking and pressing it down. Not sure if I'm going to jar it yet -- boiling will stabilize it, but also kill the fermentation, which is supposedly the biggest health-aspect to this dish. Any one out there with advice/opinions on canning this kraut?

ADDENDA:
My back aches when I wake up, which I suppose is normal for a man my age. As I loosen up and wake up, it's pretty much gone in 15 minutes or so. However, this morning, my back and my wrists ached. The last time my wrists felt like this, I had hit a bad pothole on my bike and my wrists were forced to act as shock absorbers -- and they didn't hurt until the next day. I don't remember any dramatic potholes and yesterday's ride out to Coney. Could it be the crap food I've been eating lately? The weather? My mom had lots of issues with her wrists in her later years. I think I should get Ilsa's admonishments into my head and focus on eating a little better, particularly with the effect the restaurant is having on my diet. Today's yoga took my wrists out of their comfort zone, but I only found one or two positions newly out of reach, and they felt better after.

The yoga studio I attend is not afraid to aggressively push its agenda, which I appreciate. While they're not stealthily trying to turn you into a tree-huggin', whale-lovin' hippy, they are upfront about their views. Still, when today's instructor mentioned meat eaters who, "sexually manipulate people, then kill them to eat them," that made me giggle. The HVS had to explain to me that 'people' and animals are used interchangeably, and that the sexual manipulation was referring to breeding practices in industrial settings, not necessarily bestiality (though I assume the yoga peeps are against that too. As am I -- for the record).

BREAKFAST: 10am, 1 apple, .25 bowl, hunger 3/5

AM SNACK: 11:30am, flax-seed tortilla chips, .25 bowl, hunger 4/5
Don't want to be too hungry when going to yoga.

SNICKLE SNACK: 2:45pm, cup of kitcheri, big vegan Cesar salad, 3 small pieces of 'taco toast', water, 1.5 bowl, hunger 4/5
After-yoga vegan fiesta with the HVS. The studio's cafe has recently redid their menu, with the taco toast (black beans, tomato, avocado and chimichurri sauce on triangles of toasted whole wheat bread) being a new thing. Not particularly great, but not boring.

PM SNACK: 5:30pm, 3 freshly baked chocolate chip cookies, .25 bowl, hunger 4/5
Baked the remainder of the dough for when B got home, kept them in an extra 3 minutes, nice and crunchy.

DINNER: 7:30pm, fresh spinach pasta with shrimp, olive oil and garlic and parm, 1.5 bowl, hunger 4/5
Not bad for a meal where the two main ingredients were out of the freezer. Used some rocking rocambole garlic from the farmer's market.

Porny-Named Things at the Restaurant Supply Shop

I was in a restaurant supply store to kill some time between appointments, looking among all the devices and equipment I experienced at c-school -- damn, I would love a potato ricer to make proper purees. That tortilla press sure is inexpensive. Huh, those miniature tart pans sure are overpriced. But when I got to the "Tunnel of Bundt", I gasped -- if this ain't the root of food-porn, I don't know what is!

ADDENDA:

To tired to cook today. Ordered in dinner, tipped an extra buck.

BREAKFAST: 9:15am, brioche french toast with 2 slices of bacon, 2 small sugar donuts, water, 1 bowl, hunger 4/5

Treated myself to Balthazar breakfast after an early morning doctor's app't. (Don't worry, everything is fine.) Have really liked this restaurant for a long time, but looking at the food from a culinary point of view, I was slightly underwhelmed. The donuts were good and fresh, but there was nothing special about them to justify the $2 for a small donut -- it's $2 at the donut plant for a similar size and style but 2x as good. The french toast was good, they went for a very light and pillowy thing, but for $14, I'd either want something more substantial or a 3rd piece. As Chef A ruefully said about a recent dining experience yesterday: "Good is the new Excellent."

LUNCH: 2:45pm, hot dog, fried potatoes, 1.25 bowl, hunger 4/5
On the Coney Island boardwalk, under the cold sun with the HVS, after a nice strolling bike ride down from Manhattan.

PM WATERING: 6pm, quart of water

DINNER: 7pm, egg roll, shrimp toast, singapore mai fun, apple-cheese pie, 2 bowl, hunger 4/5

It ain't easy being over-cheesed...y.

An uneventful but pleasantly rolling Monday evening. There was only one delivery boy, so I ended up jumping in and doing 4 runs through the night.

During prep, I made the slice pies from start to finish for the first time. The restaurant's slices are large squares that are cut into 9 pieces. Eight hundred grams of dough are stretched across the well-seasoned steel pan, then sauced with a simple cooked stewed tomato sauce, doused with some olive oil and salt, then cooked in the oven for 18 minutes. It's then taken out and topped with shredded moz, then baked again for about 10 minutes until the cheese starts to brown.

The thing is, when you are applying the cheese to the partially cooked sauced crust, you need to go light, because when the cheese melts in spreads out horizontally. I laid on the cheese so it looked right, with a minimal amount of red sticking out, but once cooked, you had slices of pizza that were out of balance -- too much cheese, not enough sauce and bread. You live, you learn.

ADDENDA:
The scale said 223.8 this morning. I'm a little surprised I'm maintaining my weight, I feel like I may be eating too much, or maybe it's just that I'm eating crappily -- the cold weather is maing me want to pack in heavy, fatty, sugary stuff.

BREAKFAST: 11am, slice of apple cheese pie, .75 bowl, hunger 4/5

LUNCH: Noon, a variety of things from WF's cold and hot bar, 1 bowl, hunger 4/5
Almost all vegetarian, mostly nasty. Zucchini latka tasted a bit like pooh, the falafel ball was laughably dry and crumbly, the seaweed salad was under seasoned, the potato samosa underspiced and the 'Chinese noodle salad' was just gooey.

PM SNACK: 5pm, 1 pizza slice, .75 bowl, hunger 4/5

DINNER: 9:45pm, rigatoni with mushrooms, root beer, flourless chocolate cake, 1.5 bowl, hunger 4/5

EVENING WATERING: 11:30pm, 1 quart

Cauliflower Power

This was the weekend of cauliflower. The restaurant has one off-menu special pie every night, usually something both original and "seasonal" -- I use quotes because some ingredients are technically seasonal, but in truth are available all year round. Sure, cauliflower is in season right now, but we get in imported from South America every day of the year.

Anyway, Chef A has been thinking in terms of soup-pizza: what soups could work well when baked on a crust. He decided on pureed cauliflower, a substance that has an oddly mashed-potato vibe to it. He was riffing out loud, asking for ideas. I've never been a fan of cauliflower -- my most recent experiences with it are when B orders a cauliflower pasta dish that smells like feet. I suggested mellow roasted garlic would be a nice complement.

So I go out to the markets to pick up cauliflower and chives. I steam the florets to soft with a few cloves of garlic, then put it all in the food processor, throwing in heavy cream, butter and salt as I go. Chef A makes a pie with four quadrants, each with the puree and different toppings -- fennel and provolone; cherry tomatoes and chives; mushroom and Gorgonzola; artichoke. Though I liked the tomato one as being the most visually attractive, all the pies were overwhelmed by their toppings, none having a strong cauliflower taste. So Chef A went back to the drawing board. I ran out and got another head of cauliflower, and we sliced the florets thin so we could roast them in the oven.

The next day, I asked Chef A how the special went and he said a customer had complimented the kitchen for producing their favorite pizza ever. I spent the day, outside the usual routine, making a new batch of cauliflower puree. This time I added 5x more steamed garlic, upped the roasted garlic and went lighter on the cream and heavier on the butter. The garlic was still mellow, but their was a creamier aspect happening without the heaviness of actual cream. At the end of m shift, I had A make me a special: first fresh moza is put lightly on the crust, as a layer of heat protection to keep the puree from burning. Then the puree is spread on, then it is topped with small amount of shredded provolone, roasted cauliflower and caramelized onion. It tasted nothing like feet, and the two cheeses and the mellow sweetness of the onions brought out the nicer earthy aspects of the vegetable.


ADDENDA:
On Sunday after work, I met E on bikes, we went grocery shopping, then went home and whipped out six pies, three pumpkin (from actual pumpkin, not cans) and three apple-cheese pie, involving cubes 0f sharp cheddar in the filling and grated cheddar in the crust. For the crusts, we used a vodka dough recipe, which came out perfectly flaky and light as advertised. It was crazy fun, and I noticed a lot of little things that I picked up in c-school as we went along.

I had a bunch of dough left over that went in the freezer, I wonder what pies I should make in the next few weeks....

SATURDAY BREAKFAST: 9:30am, banana, 2 frozen waffles, small ramekin of chocolate ice cream, 1 bowl, hunger 4/5

LUNCH: 4pm, roasted potatoes, cheesecake, orange soda, cauliflower pizza, 1 bowl, hunger 4/5

DINNER: 7:15pm, fresh shrimp spring roll, sushi rolls, 1 bowl, hunger 4/5

EVENING SNACK: 11pm, mac n' cheese casserole, 1 bowl. hunger 4/5

SUNDAY
BREAKFAST: 8:30am, apple, bagel with homemade hummus, 1.25 bowl, hunger 4/5

BRUNCH: Noon, 4 pieces focaccia french toast, .75 bowl, hunger 4/5

LUNCH: 4pm, cauliflower pizza, root beer, 1.5 bowl, hunger 4/5

DINNER: 9pm, small block of mac n' cheese casserole, half a small Wolfgang Puck frozen pizza, half slices of freshly baked pumpkin and apple-cheese pie, 2 bowl, hunger 4/5
Wolfgang Puck's frozen pizza was surprisingly clownish, thick crust even for a frozen pizza, overcheesed and not fresh tasting. I doubt he ever had anything to do with this commerical blandness, other than give his name to it.

Chumbawumba

There is a cake the restaurant makes for the weekend called (sp) Chumbaloni, a big lemony/anise flavored Bundt that's a little dry and perfect with coffee. The recipe is from the owner's grandma, it's typed on a piece of yellowed parchment, probably from the 1920s or '30s. Chef R translated it, and all the measures are either in cups or 'a little this' and a 'pinch of that'. Among other things, instead of using baking powder, we have these odd packets of vanilla-infused Italian baking powder. As I went along measuring the ingredients in the little old Italian woman-way, I weighed everything out on a scale. If the cake comes out good, we'll replace grandma's measures with the digital measures. Because you want the same grandma taste every time!

Some of the staff affectionately refers to the cake as 'chumbawumba'. A shot of anise-flavored liquor is a nice weighty flavor against the vanilla.

ADDENDA:
I think I'm going to make a slow fermented raw sauerkraut soon for the HVS and myself. She needs it for her vegan cleanse program, and it sounds like a tangy potentially lower-salt kraut thang for me. All I need to get is a bucket with a cover that fits inside the walls, a food-grade weight, and a wife who won't object to a bucket of wet decaying cabbage in the house.

BREAKFAST: 9:45am, apple, .25 bowl, hunger 4/5

LUNCH: 11am, mac n' cheese casserole, 3 chocolate chip cookies, 1.5 bowl, hunger 4/5 Surprisingly hungry early, must of been yesterday's riding.

LUNCH 2: 5:30pm, slice with mushrooms and onions, Teany tea, 1 bowl, hunger 4/5

PM SNACK:9pm, ginger ale

DINNER: 10:30pm, lasagna, flourless chocolate cake, water, 2 bowl, hunger 4/5