ADDENDA:
I've for a long time thought a lot of problems in this country could be solved if food wasn't so cheap. Now with the crap economy, we're on the verge of seeing food prices rise, I'm afraid more problems will be created world wide than solved locally, with food-riots in places where people already spend more than 50% of their incomes on getting fed. Yes, we'll eat out less, eat small portions and maybe not eat so wastefully, but must that be accompanied by people in other places starving? It makes me ill at ease, especially when I'm at the markets buying up the finest ingredients possible.
BREAKFAST: 9:30am, good yogurt with cashews, honey, and vanilla, 1 banana, .75 bowl, hunger 4/5
LUNCH: 1pm, lamb on pita, 1.5 bowl, hunger 4/5
After spending a few hours wrapping up a project in the offices, grabbed a lamb pita from the good vendor, with the real lamb and hand-made condiments. Sat in Central Park at the Poet's Walk while eating it and making phone calls. I used to sit here with my father every time we came to the park together, sit and read, be quiet, usually between a movie, museum or opera and a meal.
Soon after my father died, I dreamed that I came to this spot and he was there, elderly but in good health and able to walk on his own. We sat, and he apologized for dying, and said he already missed me and mom horrendously, and he thanked me and my mom for being so good to him in his last few years, when yes, we could of dumped him in a home but every effort was (successfully) made to allow him to spend his last months living in his own home. He said to look after myself and my mother, and then we hugged. As I squeezed him, I closed my eyes and -poof- out of my arms he dissipated like smoke. I woke up from that dream feeling a bit more settled about it, and I was happy I got to see him again. I've had a few dreams over the years where I've spoken with my parents, all conscious that they are dead.
I pedalled over to the Whitney to check out the Biennial, but the line was wrapped around the block. I was looking forward to checking out the Edward Hoppers, as he was my father's favorite painter and we would sit and stare at them together every time we were there.
PM SNACK: 2:15pm, shrimp summer roll, .75 bowl, hunger 4/5
Picked up ingredients for a dinner with B at WF, got this to hold me over till then.
PM SNACK: 5pm, shortbread, .5 bowl, hunger 4/5
Cooking up a storm, got hungry. Better to have sweets now than before bed.
DINNER: 7pm, spinach salad, a couple of raviolis, lasagna, half glass of white wine, water, 2 bowls, hunger 4/5
I made cheese & vegetable ravioli from scratch, which Betsy had, while I had the Dinnerfest meaty lasagna. The ravioli was good - fresh egg dough, the filling made up of ricotta, fresh moz, parm, spinach, sauteed & diced portabellos, chives, shallots, sun dried tomatoes, nutmeg, eggs, salt and pepper. I lightly sauteed the raviolis in olive oil, elephant garlic, more chives, white wine and lemon juice, came out really interesting (in a good way). Made enough raviolis to cover a couple of counter tops, drying a little before I bag them for the freezer. B tucked into chocolate soy ice cream, but I resisted...
PM SNACK: 9pm, veggie booty, .5 bowl, hunger 4/5
EVENING SNACK: 11pm, chocolate soy ice cream, .5 bowl, hunger 4/5
Serious sugar cravings, made me very cranky. I gave in.
Showing posts with label yogurt. Show all posts
Showing posts with label yogurt. Show all posts
Friday, April 11
Saturday, April 5
Sad Salad
ADDENDA:
Spent the day riding a desk, banging out a business presentation at the old office. 10 hour day went by in a flash, interrupted by bleah food. Good thing I brought a snack...BREAKFAST: 9am, good yogurt with honey and vanilla, banana, .75 bowl, hunger 3/5
PM SNACK: 12:30pm, apple & funky cheese, .5 bowl, hunger 4/5
LUNCH: 1:15pm, turkey sandwich on kaiser, small handful of fries, water, 1.5 bowl, hunger 4/5
From a crappy midtown deli, on the company as I'm working freelance in the office today. Funny, it was easy to resist gorging on the fries.DINNER: 7:15pm, eggplant parm with spag, small green salad, 2.5 bowls, hunger 4/5
Again dinner in the office, ordered from who knows where. The salad was a bit sad.
EVENING SNACK: 10pm, homemade almond ice cream, .5 bowls, hunger 4/5
After spending the day working in the office, felt the need for a treat.
Thursday, April 3
Donut, Interrupted
ADDENDA:
Heading out on a bike ride around 11am, my first thought was, "Let's go get a donut!" My neighborhood shop, the Doughnut Plant, has some of the best artisan donuts in the entire city. Previously, I would 'balance' my healthy activities with indulgences in unhealthy habits. Looking back, that's kinda retarded - I want to cancel out my healthy activities?! Donuts, like other ornate sweets, alcohol, magical brownies, 5 course meals etc should be saved for special ocassions with friends, not a semi-regular bike ride.
So I paused and munched down an apple to help me get going.
BREAKFAST: 7:15am, good yogurt with honey and vanilla, banana, .75 bowl, hunger 3/5
AM SNACK: 11am, apple, .5 bowl, hunger 4/5
AM-PM WATERING: 11-3pm, 20 oz water, 15 oz water/gatoraide mix
Brought along my camelback as well as a bottle of half purple gatoraide and half water - still haven't found a healthier satisfying replacement for this chemical brew.
PM SNACK: 1:30pm, bag of chips, 1 bowl, hunger 4/5
Stomach not ready for lunch, but hungry.
PM SNACK: 3:30pm, homemade powerbar, .25 bowl, hunger 4/5
PM SNACK: 5:45, boca burger on superhippy bread with pickles, .5 bowl, hunger 4/5
After ride, home to change quickly, but I was uncomfortably hungry, so I had to eat something.
DINNER: 6:30, 3 pieces of good bread with butter, duck confit amuse bouche, appetizer of crispy 'bacon' pork fatback with apple dressing, lamb loin, roasted onions, a couple of brussel sprouts, garlic risotto, weird mushrooms, 1.5 glasses prosecco, water, chocolate tart, meyer lemon beinets, 3.5 bowls, hunger 4/5
Dinner with B & a friend at Craft, probably my favorite NYC fine-dining establishment. I misordered by getting the bacon appetizer, which on an near-empty, hungry stomach, kind of made me feel all greasy and coated on the inside, I would of done better to of started with a raw fish.
Heading out on a bike ride around 11am, my first thought was, "Let's go get a donut!" My neighborhood shop, the Doughnut Plant, has some of the best artisan donuts in the entire city. Previously, I would 'balance' my healthy activities with indulgences in unhealthy habits. Looking back, that's kinda retarded - I want to cancel out my healthy activities?! Donuts, like other ornate sweets, alcohol, magical brownies, 5 course meals etc should be saved for special ocassions with friends, not a semi-regular bike ride.
So I paused and munched down an apple to help me get going.
BREAKFAST: 7:15am, good yogurt with honey and vanilla, banana, .75 bowl, hunger 3/5
AM SNACK: 11am, apple, .5 bowl, hunger 4/5
AM-PM WATERING: 11-3pm, 20 oz water, 15 oz water/gatoraide mix
Brought along my camelback as well as a bottle of half purple gatoraide and half water - still haven't found a healthier satisfying replacement for this chemical brew.
PM SNACK: 1:30pm, bag of chips, 1 bowl, hunger 4/5
Stomach not ready for lunch, but hungry.
PM SNACK: 3:30pm, homemade powerbar, .25 bowl, hunger 4/5
PM SNACK: 5:45, boca burger on superhippy bread with pickles, .5 bowl, hunger 4/5
After ride, home to change quickly, but I was uncomfortably hungry, so I had to eat something.
DINNER: 6:30, 3 pieces of good bread with butter, duck confit amuse bouche, appetizer of crispy 'bacon' pork fatback with apple dressing, lamb loin, roasted onions, a couple of brussel sprouts, garlic risotto, weird mushrooms, 1.5 glasses prosecco, water, chocolate tart, meyer lemon beinets, 3.5 bowls, hunger 4/5
Dinner with B & a friend at Craft, probably my favorite NYC fine-dining establishment. I misordered by getting the bacon appetizer, which on an near-empty, hungry stomach, kind of made me feel all greasy and coated on the inside, I would of done better to of started with a raw fish.
Tuesday, April 1
Freezer to Tummy
ADDENDA:
Slept like a brick again last night, 11 hours of blissful deep sleep. Met with Ilsa, her main advice is to eat less n' do more if I want to continue to lose weight. She asked me how I'm doing with the sweets, it occurred to me I couldn't remember the last time I had a sweets-free day (other than today). I need to finish tagging these entries then I'll know...
BREAKFAST: 10:15am, good yogurt with honey and vanilla, .5 bowls, hunger 4/5
Limited myself to 1/3 of the container instead of the usual 1/2.
LUNCH: 1pm, pork tonkatsu with curry sauce, white rice, pickle, cabbage, 4 pork dumplings, 2.5 bowls, hunger 4/5
Midtown lunch by the old offices with a friend. Meal came with a cup of miso soup, but skipped it, as it's a salt trap I don't need. Still enough food.
PM SNACK: 7pm, half a homemade calzone, .5 bowl, hunger 4/5
Dragging this thing out with me all day, had to eat it or throw it out. The crust went a bit stale but the innards were well preserved.
DINNER: 9pm, homemade mac n' cheese, 2 bowls, hunger 4/5
Outta the freezer, into mah tummy. After microwaving, it was a bit frightening the amount of grease that I poured off the plate into the sink. Still, yummy in mah tummy!
Slept like a brick again last night, 11 hours of blissful deep sleep. Met with Ilsa, her main advice is to eat less n' do more if I want to continue to lose weight. She asked me how I'm doing with the sweets, it occurred to me I couldn't remember the last time I had a sweets-free day (other than today). I need to finish tagging these entries then I'll know...
BREAKFAST: 10:15am, good yogurt with honey and vanilla, .5 bowls, hunger 4/5
Limited myself to 1/3 of the container instead of the usual 1/2.
LUNCH: 1pm, pork tonkatsu with curry sauce, white rice, pickle, cabbage, 4 pork dumplings, 2.5 bowls, hunger 4/5
Midtown lunch by the old offices with a friend. Meal came with a cup of miso soup, but skipped it, as it's a salt trap I don't need. Still enough food.
PM SNACK: 7pm, half a homemade calzone, .5 bowl, hunger 4/5
Dragging this thing out with me all day, had to eat it or throw it out. The crust went a bit stale but the innards were well preserved.
DINNER: 9pm, homemade mac n' cheese, 2 bowls, hunger 4/5
Outta the freezer, into mah tummy. After microwaving, it was a bit frightening the amount of grease that I poured off the plate into the sink. Still, yummy in mah tummy!
Friday, January 11
Salty Sausage
ADDENDA:
Had a slow morning, raining out. Got a call from work for a quick & lucrative freelance project, so am going in this afternoon. Emotionally, feel good about it, though I have to postpone some home projects and making pizza dough for the first time...
BREAKFAST: 10:15am, good yogurt with honey, vanilla, raw cashews, hunger 3/5
LUNCH: 2pm, curry lamb sausage with brown jasmine rice, half of a seltzer bottle, hunger 4/5
The sausage was unexpectedly salty, unpleasantly so. Sweated onions and garlic properly for the first time, but it couldn't save the meat.
PM SNACK: 5:45m, street hot dog, grape soda, hunger 4/5
In a weird mood, just checked in at the office and locked in a small but lucrative freelance gig for tomorrow. Mixed emotions. On the way to B's cousin's house, snacked on food that reminded me very much of childhood. I was a FIEND for grape soda, and this brand, Boylans, uses sugar cane as opposed to corn syrup - tastes exactly as I remember it. The hot dog, from Grey's Papaya, was surprisingly off-putting in it's salty/fake smokey taste.
DINNER: 8pm, slices of delivery pizza, 2 glasses champagne, small green salad, handful of almonds, one odd gin drink, hunger 4/5
Nice to be sitting around a table eating the same food as 4 other people!
Had a slow morning, raining out. Got a call from work for a quick & lucrative freelance project, so am going in this afternoon. Emotionally, feel good about it, though I have to postpone some home projects and making pizza dough for the first time...
BREAKFAST: 10:15am, good yogurt with honey, vanilla, raw cashews, hunger 3/5
LUNCH: 2pm, curry lamb sausage with brown jasmine rice, half of a seltzer bottle, hunger 4/5
The sausage was unexpectedly salty, unpleasantly so. Sweated onions and garlic properly for the first time, but it couldn't save the meat.
PM SNACK: 5:45m, street hot dog, grape soda, hunger 4/5
In a weird mood, just checked in at the office and locked in a small but lucrative freelance gig for tomorrow. Mixed emotions. On the way to B's cousin's house, snacked on food that reminded me very much of childhood. I was a FIEND for grape soda, and this brand, Boylans, uses sugar cane as opposed to corn syrup - tastes exactly as I remember it. The hot dog, from Grey's Papaya, was surprisingly off-putting in it's salty/fake smokey taste.
DINNER: 8pm, slices of delivery pizza, 2 glasses champagne, small green salad, handful of almonds, one odd gin drink, hunger 4/5
Nice to be sitting around a table eating the same food as 4 other people!
Monday, January 7
Back at Work Work
ADDENDA:
Feels weird to be back at work. Unnatural. Just had a nice conversation with a coworker who is starting to make her own pasta, I enjoyed being able to tell her the best recipe for a beginner, which was just me a few months ago!
BREAKFAST: 8:45am, good yogurt with honey, vanilla, raw nuts, hunger 3/5
BP: 9:45am, 120/99
I took my BP after reading my work email. oy - mistake, I got several crazy readings, including this one.
AM WATERING: 10am, 24 oz still
LUNCH: 1:45pm, Indian lunch combo with spinach, chickpeas, lentils, rice & nan, hunger 3.5/5
Didn't feel hungry due to work stress until I started eating and realized I actually really was ready for a meal. B.B.T. (Before Blogging & Thinking), I'd of probably just not eaten till I all of a sudden couldn't function and realized I was hungry, then binge on cookies...
DINNER: 7pm, large green salad with organic Italian dressing, small frozen pizza, half bottle of seltzer, hunger 4/5
Weird end of the day at work, messing with my hunger. Frozen pizza been in the freezer for months, ate it before it went bad.
Feels weird to be back at work. Unnatural. Just had a nice conversation with a coworker who is starting to make her own pasta, I enjoyed being able to tell her the best recipe for a beginner, which was just me a few months ago!
BREAKFAST: 8:45am, good yogurt with honey, vanilla, raw nuts, hunger 3/5
BP: 9:45am, 120/99
I took my BP after reading my work email. oy - mistake, I got several crazy readings, including this one.
AM WATERING: 10am, 24 oz still
LUNCH: 1:45pm, Indian lunch combo with spinach, chickpeas, lentils, rice & nan, hunger 3.5/5
Didn't feel hungry due to work stress until I started eating and realized I actually really was ready for a meal. B.B.T. (Before Blogging & Thinking), I'd of probably just not eaten till I all of a sudden couldn't function and realized I was hungry, then binge on cookies...
DINNER: 7pm, large green salad with organic Italian dressing, small frozen pizza, half bottle of seltzer, hunger 4/5
Weird end of the day at work, messing with my hunger. Frozen pizza been in the freezer for months, ate it before it went bad.
Friday, January 4
Still Takin' Care of Bizniz
ADDENDA:
The bedroom is a much larger job than I anticipated. Gonna try to knock it off today, then pretend like I'm unemployed and see an afternoon movie...
BREAKFAST: 8:30am, good yogurt with honey, vanilla and raw nuts, hunger 3/5
Out of just about everything else, need to hit up some markets.
LUNCH: 12:45pm, wholewheat pasta a la Noah, quart of tap water, hunger 4/5
Felt lazy, indecisive, rearranging and painting the apartment all morning. Got a flash of inspiration, and cooked up some pasta, and took a bunch of garlic and onion and sweated them with olive oil and butter, then threw in a little white wine, Worcestershire sauce and salt and let it reduce, finished with freshly grated parm. Damn, was pretty damn good, though not sure what it's officially called. Could of really used some mushrooms, maybe a little less Worcestershire - three shakes out of the bottle was pretty strong. After finishing it, felt good for cooking and not ordering in or just reheating something. Good to be able to cook a casual lunch.
PM SNACK: 6:30pm, 3/4 bag of popcorn, hunger 4/5
Two movies in a row at the multiplex, with a popcorn in between, like I was unemployed. This is vacation.
DINNER: 9:30pm, curry noodle soup with tofu, water, hunger 3/5
Mediocre meal at Thai resto in the hood.
The bedroom is a much larger job than I anticipated. Gonna try to knock it off today, then pretend like I'm unemployed and see an afternoon movie...
BREAKFAST: 8:30am, good yogurt with honey, vanilla and raw nuts, hunger 3/5
Out of just about everything else, need to hit up some markets.
LUNCH: 12:45pm, wholewheat pasta a la Noah, quart of tap water, hunger 4/5
Felt lazy, indecisive, rearranging and painting the apartment all morning. Got a flash of inspiration, and cooked up some pasta, and took a bunch of garlic and onion and sweated them with olive oil and butter, then threw in a little white wine, Worcestershire sauce and salt and let it reduce, finished with freshly grated parm. Damn, was pretty damn good, though not sure what it's officially called. Could of really used some mushrooms, maybe a little less Worcestershire - three shakes out of the bottle was pretty strong. After finishing it, felt good for cooking and not ordering in or just reheating something. Good to be able to cook a casual lunch.
PM SNACK: 6:30pm, 3/4 bag of popcorn, hunger 4/5
Two movies in a row at the multiplex, with a popcorn in between, like I was unemployed. This is vacation.
DINNER: 9:30pm, curry noodle soup with tofu, water, hunger 3/5
Mediocre meal at Thai resto in the hood.
Thursday, January 3
Takin' Care of Bizniz
ADDENDA:
The real vacation continues. Got a lot done yesterday, laundry, sourced touch-up paint for the house, replaced a duvet cover Betsy had ill will towards, dinner with B and a good friend. Today I have an electrician taking care of business, gonna redo the placement of furniture in the bedroom, retouch the paint on the scuffed walls, get a new light fixture for the bedroom, cull my closets and my cooking pans, and catch a 3pmish train up to Westchester to spend the eve with another friend I don't see often enough. Well, I'm sure I'll get through some of it!
Betsy reported she got a good scolding at from Ilsa for changing up her diet so extremely without consulting her - funny, I also kinda went beserk on B for the same reason! (not consulting Ilsa, not me) Ilsa also expressed her concerns that I'm falling back into bad habits - that Chinese brick a few weeks ago scared the bejeezus out of her.
BREAKFAST: 10:15am, good yogurt with honey, vanilla, raw nuts, hunger 4/5
Woke at 8:30 to the electrician calling, delayed eating as he was doing his business. Certain fixtures haven't worked in years, but they were relatively minor and a hassle to call a professional for - but perfect when your off the first week of the year and electricians are not!
Never delayed breakfast like this, surprised how hungry I got after about 90 minutes.
LUNCH: 1pm, whole wheat bagel with homemade hummus, glass of seltzer, hunger 4/5
PM SNACK: 5pm, 6 'deluxe' chocolate-filled cookie tubes, hunger 4/5
DINNER: 6:30pm, sushi tray, small green salad, 6 shrimp shumai, 2 ok chocolate truffles, 1 fortune cookie, water, hunger 4/5
Ordered in at my friend's house in Westchester. She proposed our only choices were pizza or Chinese. I chose Chinese, wondering what I would order that wouldn't be brick-like. Fortunately, on the other side of the menu was Japanese, so I stuck with the sushi. As I was pondering the Chinese, saw their list of bricks, remembered how I felt ill the next day, and I really didn't want to waste my time off regretting Chinese...
EVENING SNACK: 11pm, 3 vegan chocolate macaroon-like thingies, 1 whole wheat saltfree pretzel, 2 mint chip tofutti cuties, hunger 4/5
I guess dinner wasn't enough, and had insomnia on top of it.
The real vacation continues. Got a lot done yesterday, laundry, sourced touch-up paint for the house, replaced a duvet cover Betsy had ill will towards, dinner with B and a good friend. Today I have an electrician taking care of business, gonna redo the placement of furniture in the bedroom, retouch the paint on the scuffed walls, get a new light fixture for the bedroom, cull my closets and my cooking pans, and catch a 3pmish train up to Westchester to spend the eve with another friend I don't see often enough. Well, I'm sure I'll get through some of it!
Betsy reported she got a good scolding at from Ilsa for changing up her diet so extremely without consulting her - funny, I also kinda went beserk on B for the same reason! (not consulting Ilsa, not me) Ilsa also expressed her concerns that I'm falling back into bad habits - that Chinese brick a few weeks ago scared the bejeezus out of her.
BREAKFAST: 10:15am, good yogurt with honey, vanilla, raw nuts, hunger 4/5
Woke at 8:30 to the electrician calling, delayed eating as he was doing his business. Certain fixtures haven't worked in years, but they were relatively minor and a hassle to call a professional for - but perfect when your off the first week of the year and electricians are not!
Never delayed breakfast like this, surprised how hungry I got after about 90 minutes.
LUNCH: 1pm, whole wheat bagel with homemade hummus, glass of seltzer, hunger 4/5
PM SNACK: 5pm, 6 'deluxe' chocolate-filled cookie tubes, hunger 4/5
DINNER: 6:30pm, sushi tray, small green salad, 6 shrimp shumai, 2 ok chocolate truffles, 1 fortune cookie, water, hunger 4/5
Ordered in at my friend's house in Westchester. She proposed our only choices were pizza or Chinese. I chose Chinese, wondering what I would order that wouldn't be brick-like. Fortunately, on the other side of the menu was Japanese, so I stuck with the sushi. As I was pondering the Chinese, saw their list of bricks, remembered how I felt ill the next day, and I really didn't want to waste my time off regretting Chinese...
EVENING SNACK: 11pm, 3 vegan chocolate macaroon-like thingies, 1 whole wheat saltfree pretzel, 2 mint chip tofutti cuties, hunger 4/5
I guess dinner wasn't enough, and had insomnia on top of it.
Saturday, December 29
A Day at the Markets
ADDENDA:
Feel a bit out of touch with food, haven't been to the farmer's market since before Las Vegas. So I hopped on the bike and off I went....and felt what the winter market is all about. It's literally half as big as it was around Thanksgiving, and 1/3 as big as it was full swing in the summer. The meat/dairy/baked goods peeps were all there, but other than apples and gourds, there wasn't much in way of produce. I got the crazy-good lamb sausage and superhippy bread, but not much else.
I road to Wholefoods, and bought up a full green salad and supplies, focusing on a short shopping list of vegan stuff B wants to experiment with. I look forward to her (and the HVS) trying my home-made chocolate soy ice cream, it kicks some serious ass. It puts chocolate tofutti to shame, if I don't say so myself.
After the markets and before cooking, I felt lazy and didn't want to cook, but didn't want to order in food, as you're forced to buy a lot of food for a minimum order. So in true NY-lazy style, I wanted to go to the pizza place around the corner but didn't want to walk so far....so I hopped on my bike for the 120-second ride! I know in the suburbs people will get in the car to go around the corner to drop their fat-ass kids off at the bus stop, I now know how they feel....
BREAKFAST: 10am, good yogurt with honey and raw cashews, hunger 3/5
Outta vanilla!
LUNCH: 1:30pm, 2 slices streetza, bottle of water, hunger 4/5
After getting back from the markets, put everything away and pedalled around the corner to A1, the local slice joint. This is the place my parents would order pizza from. I like it because it has character - unlike a lot of other NYC slice places, these slices have a nice thin coat of sauce and a thinner, spotty coating of cheese - no goopfest here.
DINNER: 7pm, fresh wholewheat pasta, tomato sauce, pork/veal/spinach concoction, green salad, chocolate soy ice cream, lame biscoti, 2 glasses red wine, hunger 4/5
Friend just came in to town staying with me for a couple of nights, an excellent excuse to try some experimental cooking on someone (and have a friendly face to help washup! Thanks, Rach!) It was to be meat ravioli, but I failed to mix any white flour into the wholewheat and in the end it was both too tacky and too rigid to bend to shape into the ravioli forms.
So I scrapped it and went with linguine, with the stuffing as a side of meaty stuff. I got the recipe for the meat stuffing off the internet, and it was all wrong, I adjusted a few things to keep it reasonable but it failed. It needed white wine. Also, I bought pre-ground meats, it was a bit too chunky. I need to get a meat grinder attachment for the mixer to make nicely smooth meat paste! (Mmmmm! Meat paste!)
The only non-home made item was the biscoti, which reaked of fennel, oddly enough. But the soy-ice cream (silken tofu, unsweetened soy milk, maple syrup, cocoa powder, 70% dark chocolate) came out surprisingly rich and tasty, not tofuy at all or oily-fake like tofutti. We ate it straight from the machine, so it had a smooth, soft-serve consistency.
PM WATERING: 10pm, 2/3 of a bottle of Perrier
EVENING SNACK: 11pm, small bowl of veggie booty, hunger 3/5
Feel a bit out of touch with food, haven't been to the farmer's market since before Las Vegas. So I hopped on the bike and off I went....and felt what the winter market is all about. It's literally half as big as it was around Thanksgiving, and 1/3 as big as it was full swing in the summer. The meat/dairy/baked goods peeps were all there, but other than apples and gourds, there wasn't much in way of produce. I got the crazy-good lamb sausage and superhippy bread, but not much else.
I road to Wholefoods, and bought up a full green salad and supplies, focusing on a short shopping list of vegan stuff B wants to experiment with. I look forward to her (and the HVS) trying my home-made chocolate soy ice cream, it kicks some serious ass. It puts chocolate tofutti to shame, if I don't say so myself.
After the markets and before cooking, I felt lazy and didn't want to cook, but didn't want to order in food, as you're forced to buy a lot of food for a minimum order. So in true NY-lazy style, I wanted to go to the pizza place around the corner but didn't want to walk so far....so I hopped on my bike for the 120-second ride! I know in the suburbs people will get in the car to go around the corner to drop their fat-ass kids off at the bus stop, I now know how they feel....
BREAKFAST: 10am, good yogurt with honey and raw cashews, hunger 3/5
Outta vanilla!
LUNCH: 1:30pm, 2 slices streetza, bottle of water, hunger 4/5
After getting back from the markets, put everything away and pedalled around the corner to A1, the local slice joint. This is the place my parents would order pizza from. I like it because it has character - unlike a lot of other NYC slice places, these slices have a nice thin coat of sauce and a thinner, spotty coating of cheese - no goopfest here.
DINNER: 7pm, fresh wholewheat pasta, tomato sauce, pork/veal/spinach concoction, green salad, chocolate soy ice cream, lame biscoti, 2 glasses red wine, hunger 4/5
Friend just came in to town staying with me for a couple of nights, an excellent excuse to try some experimental cooking on someone (and have a friendly face to help washup! Thanks, Rach!) It was to be meat ravioli, but I failed to mix any white flour into the wholewheat and in the end it was both too tacky and too rigid to bend to shape into the ravioli forms.
So I scrapped it and went with linguine, with the stuffing as a side of meaty stuff. I got the recipe for the meat stuffing off the internet, and it was all wrong, I adjusted a few things to keep it reasonable but it failed. It needed white wine. Also, I bought pre-ground meats, it was a bit too chunky. I need to get a meat grinder attachment for the mixer to make nicely smooth meat paste! (Mmmmm! Meat paste!)
The only non-home made item was the biscoti, which reaked of fennel, oddly enough. But the soy-ice cream (silken tofu, unsweetened soy milk, maple syrup, cocoa powder, 70% dark chocolate) came out surprisingly rich and tasty, not tofuy at all or oily-fake like tofutti. We ate it straight from the machine, so it had a smooth, soft-serve consistency.
PM WATERING: 10pm, 2/3 of a bottle of Perrier
EVENING SNACK: 11pm, small bowl of veggie booty, hunger 3/5
Thursday, December 27
Cookin' With Booze
ADDENDA:Made multiple trips to the bathroom through the night, the late night Indian did not agree with me. Was weird wandering around my home in the middle of the night without concern for turning on lights or watching the television loudly. Rufus slept where B sleeps, wasn't quite the same thing. Except in the morning he usually chews and head butts HER, this morning he inflicted his Rufusness on me.
BREAKFAST: 9:30am, good yogurt with honey, vanilla, raw nuts, hunger 2/5
After last night's roiling, didn't feel much like eating but wanted to start off on the right foot.
AM WATERING: 10:30am, 24 oz still
LUNCH: 3:30pm, beer-boiled shrimp in a wine butter sauce over a baked potato, vanilla soy ice cream, hunger 4/5
Felt tired, left work around 2:30. Picked up shrimp and a potato and improvised this meal. Have left over beer from the party that I'll never drink so sacrificed 4 of them to boil the shrimp in. Made a sauce, starting with a roux just like the mac n' cheese, but added fresh garlic and white wine and a drop of lemon instead of milk n' cheese. Microwaved a potato and through it all together in a bowl, looked so purty I had to take a picture. The smell was....French n' stinky, but good.
DINNER: 8:30pm, sushi & sashimi plate, edamame, small green salad, tea, a cookie, a few chocolates, hunger 4/5
Road my bike up to 102nd on the west side and back to visit a friend I don't get to see nearly enough. She almost cooked, but couldn't get her stuff together so we went out for Japanese. The food was nothing special but her company was, which is the point of most restaurant food, I guess.
Tuesday, December 25
Eating Through the Holidays
ADDENDA:
Like stirring cooking milk and bringing up black bits unintentionally, the relatives staying with me have brought up some emotions from the family strife I endured when my mother passed away. It's unintentional and I hold no grudge (towards my guests), but it's still a bummer.
BREAKFAST: 10:30am, good yogurt with honey, raw nuts, vanilla, hunger 3/5
Immediately from breakfast I whipped up a batch of hummus and mac n' cheese for B's cousin's Jewish Xmas thing.
AM MEDICATION: 11am, 2 tums
Knifing sensation in my chest, over my stomach and below my throat. I suspected it was an acid thing, so I took 2 tums and it promptly went away. I've never had a pain like that before. I suspect it's emotion/holiday-related.
LUNCH: 2pm-5pm, bagel with hummus & smoked salmon, 3 large butter cookies, 10 or so small pieces of Jaques Torres chocolates, medium portion of homemade mac n' cheese, 1 glass presecco, water, hunger 4/5
Holiday party at B's cousin Cathy's house. This is the third time I've been to this party since I've known my wife, it's nice to see how these things remain stable year after year. My mac n' cheese came out pretty good, I've been refining the balance of ingredients and I think I'm getting closer. The hummus I made was way too garlicky, gotta pull back on that. Felt stressed thinking about my own family, overdid it on the chocolates, and my acidy stomach came back again.
PM SNACK: 5:30pm, 1/4 homemade cookie, 1/2 apricot turnover, seltzer, hunger 2/5
Stopped by another cousin of B's on the way home, an excellent baker he is.
PM MEDICATION: 7:30pm, 2 tums
PM SNACK: 9pm, small handful of tortilla chips, 2 saltless pretzels with peanutbutter, hunger 3/5
Like stirring cooking milk and bringing up black bits unintentionally, the relatives staying with me have brought up some emotions from the family strife I endured when my mother passed away. It's unintentional and I hold no grudge (towards my guests), but it's still a bummer.
BREAKFAST: 10:30am, good yogurt with honey, raw nuts, vanilla, hunger 3/5
Immediately from breakfast I whipped up a batch of hummus and mac n' cheese for B's cousin's Jewish Xmas thing.
AM MEDICATION: 11am, 2 tums
Knifing sensation in my chest, over my stomach and below my throat. I suspected it was an acid thing, so I took 2 tums and it promptly went away. I've never had a pain like that before. I suspect it's emotion/holiday-related.
LUNCH: 2pm-5pm, bagel with hummus & smoked salmon, 3 large butter cookies, 10 or so small pieces of Jaques Torres chocolates, medium portion of homemade mac n' cheese, 1 glass presecco, water, hunger 4/5
Holiday party at B's cousin Cathy's house. This is the third time I've been to this party since I've known my wife, it's nice to see how these things remain stable year after year. My mac n' cheese came out pretty good, I've been refining the balance of ingredients and I think I'm getting closer. The hummus I made was way too garlicky, gotta pull back on that. Felt stressed thinking about my own family, overdid it on the chocolates, and my acidy stomach came back again.
PM SNACK: 5:30pm, 1/4 homemade cookie, 1/2 apricot turnover, seltzer, hunger 2/5
Stopped by another cousin of B's on the way home, an excellent baker he is.
PM MEDICATION: 7:30pm, 2 tums
PM SNACK: 9pm, small handful of tortilla chips, 2 saltless pretzels with peanutbutter, hunger 3/5
Friday, December 21
Feelin' like a lazy fat cat
ADDENDA:Not to sound too much like a chick, but I do feel fat. The pants around my belly are tight, my back has been aching a little the past few days and I can't help but think it's because of the weight I'm dragging around. Not been riding my bike at all, no time for getting into the beginning phases of a yoga habit, haven't been to the farmers market in too long. Look forward to getting back in a rhythm.
BREAKFAST: 6am, good yogurt with raw nuts, honey, vanilla, hunger 4/5
House guests arrived in the wee hours, couldn't get back to sleep so I ate and watched the tube. Funny how interrupted sleep can rev the appetite.
AM SNACK: 8am, banana, hunger 4/5
AM WATERING: 10am, 24 oz still
BP: 10:15am, 129/97
LUNCH: 1:30pm, bread with three olive oils, asparagus over mushroom, pancetta and puffy dough, pumpkin & funky cheese raviolis, 1 glass white wine, chocolate soufle with vanilla icecream, 3 small pieces of chocolate, hunger 4/5
Nice holiday lunch at Fig & Olive on 13th street. The HVS forced those three chocolates on me, she almost got violent.
DINNER: 6:30pm, small green salad, assortment of pieces of homemade pizzas, chocolate and mint ice cream, 1 glass presecco, water, hunger 4/5
Cooked up a storm for some house guests, relatives staying with me from Israel. Pizzas came out pretty good this time. Used fresh sweet sopressetta as the featured meat - on the pizza, came out like the perfect alternative to pepperoni - thin so it got crispy on the edges, pleasingly fatty but did not leave pools of grease on the 'za.
Wednesday, December 19
More Mood, Less Food
ADDENDA:
Had an interesting meeting with Ilsa last night. I'm feeling a lot of anger and ill will towards my work in general since the since-backed off corporate directives a few weeks ago, despite never feeling more happy with the people I actually work with day to day. That brick o' Chinese I scarfed the other day was probably a result of that pressure. I shouldn't let it get to me that way.
I had a friend who when she got upset at herself, would literally smack herself on the head till she bled. Is scarfing a block of sodium-infused lard with some noodles in it so different, especially when I'm not even that hungry? Ilsa is afraid pressures will cause me to backslide, when I should be simply maintaining my healthier habits through these cold winter months. I got to get a handle on this.
BREAKFAST: 8:30am, good yogurt with raw nuts, honey, vanilla, hunger 3/5
AM WATERING: 9:45am, 24 oz still
BP: 9:50am, 137/91
Despite being tired, did not sleep well last night, kept on #2ing for a few hours, then watched bad TV for an hour. Determined to eat better today, aim to go home tonight and aim for some quality ZZZs.
LUNCH: 12:45pm, superhippy peanutbutter sandwich, hummus with carrots, cuce, red pepper, celery, a few bites of cod, hunger 4/5
Cod tasted fresh, but underdressed. Next time, I'll get you, Cod!!
PM SNACK: 4:30pm, organic Fuji apple, raw milk appeller funky cheese, hunger 4/5
Chocolate being spread around the office, I heroically resisted.
DINNER: 7:45pm, 4 fresh spring rolls with shrimp, sauteed pork medallions in a mushroom wine sauce over brown jasmine rice, liter of seltzer, hunger 4/5
Oh my, this was an interest mealing meal. Click on the pic for an upclose look! Too bad these computers don't do smellovision - while the final result proved this to still be in the experimental stage, the smell in the kitchen was overwhelmingly intensely delicious.
When Ilsa was scolding me about how she doesn't care if I eat good pork every day, as long as I stay away from the bricks o' Chinese food. So I picked up a thick pork medallion and mushrooms on the way home. Rather than simply grill it and throw it over rice, I went on line and got an interesting recipe. However, I kinda winged it and added white wine, subtracted whatever 'savory' is, crushed dried rosemary in a pestle, replaced chicken stock with a container of veal stock I had in the freezer (picked up on a random shopping trip ages ago) and let rip.
Two things surprised me. One is the veal stock. I bought it originally because I read somewhere that veal stock is the 'secret weapon' of many chefs - it has the magical ability to make anything tastier. And my god, it does! I've eaten veal stock many times before but didn't know it - it's that indescribable delicious mouth feel that is like eating velvet. Damn, it's good.
Second is even though I tried to undercook the meat (browned 1 minute on each side instead of 2, let simmer in the sauce for 10 minutes instead of 15), it was STILL a little pale, dry and overcooked. Next time I do this recipe I'm going to brown it at higher heat for less time, simmer it in the sauce for less time, and get a fattier cut of meat that is still on the bone.
Had an interesting meeting with Ilsa last night. I'm feeling a lot of anger and ill will towards my work in general since the since-backed off corporate directives a few weeks ago, despite never feeling more happy with the people I actually work with day to day. That brick o' Chinese I scarfed the other day was probably a result of that pressure. I shouldn't let it get to me that way.
I had a friend who when she got upset at herself, would literally smack herself on the head till she bled. Is scarfing a block of sodium-infused lard with some noodles in it so different, especially when I'm not even that hungry? Ilsa is afraid pressures will cause me to backslide, when I should be simply maintaining my healthier habits through these cold winter months. I got to get a handle on this.
BREAKFAST: 8:30am, good yogurt with raw nuts, honey, vanilla, hunger 3/5
AM WATERING: 9:45am, 24 oz still
BP: 9:50am, 137/91
Despite being tired, did not sleep well last night, kept on #2ing for a few hours, then watched bad TV for an hour. Determined to eat better today, aim to go home tonight and aim for some quality ZZZs.
LUNCH: 12:45pm, superhippy peanutbutter sandwich, hummus with carrots, cuce, red pepper, celery, a few bites of cod, hunger 4/5
Cod tasted fresh, but underdressed. Next time, I'll get you, Cod!!
PM SNACK: 4:30pm, organic Fuji apple, raw milk appeller funky cheese, hunger 4/5
Chocolate being spread around the office, I heroically resisted.
DINNER: 7:45pm, 4 fresh spring rolls with shrimp, sauteed pork medallions in a mushroom wine sauce over brown jasmine rice, liter of seltzer, hunger 4/5
Oh my, this was an interest mealing meal. Click on the pic for an upclose look! Too bad these computers don't do smellovision - while the final result proved this to still be in the experimental stage, the smell in the kitchen was overwhelmingly intensely delicious.
When Ilsa was scolding me about how she doesn't care if I eat good pork every day, as long as I stay away from the bricks o' Chinese food. So I picked up a thick pork medallion and mushrooms on the way home. Rather than simply grill it and throw it over rice, I went on line and got an interesting recipe. However, I kinda winged it and added white wine, subtracted whatever 'savory' is, crushed dried rosemary in a pestle, replaced chicken stock with a container of veal stock I had in the freezer (picked up on a random shopping trip ages ago) and let rip.
Two things surprised me. One is the veal stock. I bought it originally because I read somewhere that veal stock is the 'secret weapon' of many chefs - it has the magical ability to make anything tastier. And my god, it does! I've eaten veal stock many times before but didn't know it - it's that indescribable delicious mouth feel that is like eating velvet. Damn, it's good.
Second is even though I tried to undercook the meat (browned 1 minute on each side instead of 2, let simmer in the sauce for 10 minutes instead of 15), it was STILL a little pale, dry and overcooked. Next time I do this recipe I'm going to brown it at higher heat for less time, simmer it in the sauce for less time, and get a fattier cut of meat that is still on the bone.
Saturday, December 15
Chillin' Out Saturday
BREAKFAST: 10am, good yogurt with nuts, honey, vanilla, hunger 4/5
LUNCH: 1:30pm, sweet sausage torteloni and 3-cheese tortellini with homemade tomato sauce, grated parm, large glass of water, 1 oz dark chocolate, hunger 4/5
PM SNACK: 6:30pm, handful of baby carrots with peanut butter, hunger 4/5
PM SNACK: 7pm, handful of tortilla chips with fresh salsa, hunger 4/5
DINNER: 9pm, brick o' Chinese, hunger 3/5
Thought I was hungrier than I was, but finished the brick anyway. What's going on here?
LUNCH: 1:30pm, sweet sausage torteloni and 3-cheese tortellini with homemade tomato sauce, grated parm, large glass of water, 1 oz dark chocolate, hunger 4/5
PM SNACK: 6:30pm, handful of baby carrots with peanut butter, hunger 4/5
PM SNACK: 7pm, handful of tortilla chips with fresh salsa, hunger 4/5
DINNER: 9pm, brick o' Chinese, hunger 3/5
Thought I was hungrier than I was, but finished the brick anyway. What's going on here?
Wednesday, December 12
Adventures in Creme Fraiche & the Dopey Delicacies of my Mom
ADDENDA:
I never liked sour cream much. I remember when I was really small, I believe my mom made a really lame rendition of matzohbrie, and she served it with sour cream. I refused to eat it, and she said that sour cream was a delicacy, that I was foolish not to eat it. By delicacy I thought she meant rare and very expensive. Years later, in my teens, I saw that sour cream was neither rare nor that expensive, and the seeds for years of parental-challenging eating were planted.
Last night as I was shopping for ingredients for latkes, I almost couldn't find matzoh meal - I thought, my god, am I such a bad Jew that I shop at supermarkets that don't have such a soulful staple? At Wholefoods it wasn't in the baking aisle, but segregated with the Semitic foodstuffs like jarred gefilte fish and beety horseradish. I went to the dairy case to find creme fraiche - and found a variety of expensive organic sour creams but none of the French stuff. I eventually stumbled onto it in the cheese section, along with the more unusual, pricey imported cheeses. Now THIS is rare and expensive!
The latkes came out good, but I have ideas how to make them better next time. However, the creme fraiche....was a delicious delicacy. Though I've had it served to me before, I never quite knew what it was or paid it much mind. When I saw this latke recipe, I first thought it was pretentious language for fresh whipped cream. It's actually a mildly cultured heavy cream, somewhere between sour cream and mild yogurt, but much more buttery & creamy tasting. Eating it with my latkes was a revelation. I wish my mom was around so I could both share this 'delicacy' with her, at the same time nervily rebutting her assertion that sour cream was somehow something to be held as dear. Maybe she was right, but the arguing of such a silly matter would of brought us both a lot of giggles. And I could hear her enjoying it, but complaining about how expensive it was for such a tiny little tub...
On a lighter note, my employer just caved in on a few key points, things may turn out OK yet.
BREAKFAST: 8am, good yogurt with honey, vanilla, raw cashews, hunger 3/5
AM WATERING: 9:45am, 24 oz still
BP: 10am, 131/88
PM SNACK: 12pm, bag of unsalted shelled pistachios, hunger 4/5
Donated about 1/4 of the bag to the HVS holiday drive.
LUNCH: 1pm, leftover lamb sausage and latkes, creme fraiche, hunger 4/5
The microwave was very unkind to this meal. Still, yummy.
PM SNACK: 4pm, big crunchy fuji apple and a small piece of apenthaller funk-cheese, hunger 4/5
Quite good.
DINNER: 6:15pm, hijiki tofu patty on wholewheat pita, large spinach salad with carrot dressing, small plate of cold sesame noodles, water, hunger 4/5
Quick dinner before the movies at Dojo.
EVENING SNACK: 7pm, large peanut-butter brownie, hunger 4/5
Oy, what a mistake. Killed my cravings, but I immediately felt a little physically yucky.
I never liked sour cream much. I remember when I was really small, I believe my mom made a really lame rendition of matzohbrie, and she served it with sour cream. I refused to eat it, and she said that sour cream was a delicacy, that I was foolish not to eat it. By delicacy I thought she meant rare and very expensive. Years later, in my teens, I saw that sour cream was neither rare nor that expensive, and the seeds for years of parental-challenging eating were planted.
Last night as I was shopping for ingredients for latkes, I almost couldn't find matzoh meal - I thought, my god, am I such a bad Jew that I shop at supermarkets that don't have such a soulful staple? At Wholefoods it wasn't in the baking aisle, but segregated with the Semitic foodstuffs like jarred gefilte fish and beety horseradish. I went to the dairy case to find creme fraiche - and found a variety of expensive organic sour creams but none of the French stuff. I eventually stumbled onto it in the cheese section, along with the more unusual, pricey imported cheeses. Now THIS is rare and expensive!
The latkes came out good, but I have ideas how to make them better next time. However, the creme fraiche....was a delicious delicacy. Though I've had it served to me before, I never quite knew what it was or paid it much mind. When I saw this latke recipe, I first thought it was pretentious language for fresh whipped cream. It's actually a mildly cultured heavy cream, somewhere between sour cream and mild yogurt, but much more buttery & creamy tasting. Eating it with my latkes was a revelation. I wish my mom was around so I could both share this 'delicacy' with her, at the same time nervily rebutting her assertion that sour cream was somehow something to be held as dear. Maybe she was right, but the arguing of such a silly matter would of brought us both a lot of giggles. And I could hear her enjoying it, but complaining about how expensive it was for such a tiny little tub...
On a lighter note, my employer just caved in on a few key points, things may turn out OK yet.
BREAKFAST: 8am, good yogurt with honey, vanilla, raw cashews, hunger 3/5
AM WATERING: 9:45am, 24 oz still
BP: 10am, 131/88
PM SNACK: 12pm, bag of unsalted shelled pistachios, hunger 4/5
Donated about 1/4 of the bag to the HVS holiday drive.
LUNCH: 1pm, leftover lamb sausage and latkes, creme fraiche, hunger 4/5
The microwave was very unkind to this meal. Still, yummy.
PM SNACK: 4pm, big crunchy fuji apple and a small piece of apenthaller funk-cheese, hunger 4/5
Quite good.
DINNER: 6:15pm, hijiki tofu patty on wholewheat pita, large spinach salad with carrot dressing, small plate of cold sesame noodles, water, hunger 4/5
Quick dinner before the movies at Dojo.
EVENING SNACK: 7pm, large peanut-butter brownie, hunger 4/5
Oy, what a mistake. Killed my cravings, but I immediately felt a little physically yucky.
Wednesday, December 5
Bolweevils of the Soul
ADDENDA:
Funny how less than a week ago I was pretty content in how my professional life was going, and now I'm weighing the advantages of leaving before I find another job, once the corporate bureaucracy allows me to negotiate for myself. It's really starting to effect my appetite, I just hope I don't get discouraged then binge when the hunger jumps up and bites me on the ass.
I am thankful that the depression I'm experiencing has a very definable outside stimulus and is not some free floating angst that makes me want to write bad poetry, like...
AM WATERING: 9:30am, 24 oz still
BP: 9:45am, 126/88
PM SNACK: 1:45pm, a few bites of curry tofu & rice, hunger 4 to 2/5
Has not aged well in the fridge, too spicy, almost bitter. Appetite was there, but then left me. Have an interesting meeting in a few minutes.
PM SNACK: 4:15pm, the insides of a falafel sandwich, hunger 4/5
Hungry, but not hungry. Didn't find the wholewheat pita appetizing, though there was nothing wrong with .
Meeting went well. Negotiated enough to stay here through January and not feel stupid, though we'll see how it goes in January.
DINNER: 7pm, a little more than half of a Margherita DOC for Isabella's Oven, baby carrots and homemade hummus, hunger 4/5
Paid extra attention to this pizza, as haven't had a fancy restaurant pie in a wild. The the crust was better than the stuff I get at wholefoods, nicely textured and chewy, a little limp but that's probably from steaming in a cardboard box for 10 minutes. The little pools of bufala moz was great, just the right minimal amount but the sauce was unattractively tangy - my sauce on the fly is much better.
EVENING SNACK: 10:15pm, 1 saltless whole wheat pretzel with good peanut butter, hunger 3/5
Felt restless after the day's events.
Funny how less than a week ago I was pretty content in how my professional life was going, and now I'm weighing the advantages of leaving before I find another job, once the corporate bureaucracy allows me to negotiate for myself. It's really starting to effect my appetite, I just hope I don't get discouraged then binge when the hunger jumps up and bites me on the ass.
I am thankful that the depression I'm experiencing has a very definable outside stimulus and is not some free floating angst that makes me want to write bad poetry, like...
Oh, such a dark and evil day,BREAKFAST: 8:30am, good yogurt with honey, vanilla and raw nuts, hunger 2/5
What do I have to do to say,
The corporate headmasters are evil,
I liken them to bolweevils,
Of the soul.
AM WATERING: 9:30am, 24 oz still
BP: 9:45am, 126/88
PM SNACK: 1:45pm, a few bites of curry tofu & rice, hunger 4 to 2/5
Has not aged well in the fridge, too spicy, almost bitter. Appetite was there, but then left me. Have an interesting meeting in a few minutes.
PM SNACK: 4:15pm, the insides of a falafel sandwich, hunger 4/5
Hungry, but not hungry. Didn't find the wholewheat pita appetizing, though there was nothing wrong with .
Meeting went well. Negotiated enough to stay here through January and not feel stupid, though we'll see how it goes in January.
DINNER: 7pm, a little more than half of a Margherita DOC for Isabella's Oven, baby carrots and homemade hummus, hunger 4/5
Paid extra attention to this pizza, as haven't had a fancy restaurant pie in a wild. The the crust was better than the stuff I get at wholefoods, nicely textured and chewy, a little limp but that's probably from steaming in a cardboard box for 10 minutes. The little pools of bufala moz was great, just the right minimal amount but the sauce was unattractively tangy - my sauce on the fly is much better.
EVENING SNACK: 10:15pm, 1 saltless whole wheat pretzel with good peanut butter, hunger 3/5
Felt restless after the day's events.
Sunday, December 2
Fun in Tme of Depression
ADDENDA:
Felt depressed today. Starting to assemble a game plan for the future, unspoken but in my mind. Felt a little crappy from eating crap yesterday, didn't make the same mistake today.
BREAKFAST: 7am, good yogurt with raw cashews, hunger 4/5
AM SNACK: 8:30am, about 1 ounce of good chocolate, some gelato custard, hunger 4/5
Cooking chocolate gelato custard, some jumped up and pounced on me, forcing itself down my throat.
BREAKFAST 2: 10:30am, veggie burger with home fries, hunger 4/5
At Kate's Joint with the HVS. It was nice spending a nice quiet morning with someone to commiserate about whats happened at work and feel good about life in general at the same time, appreciate the friends you got despite the bad stuff. We went for a beginner's vinyassa class together after, was actually surprisingly rewarding - not too easy and not too hard. Gotta travel next weekend, but this is something I could do again.
LUNCH: 2:45pm, falafel and eggplant on whole wheat pita, hunger 4/5
PM SNACK: 4:30, some gelato custard, frozen and stuck to the sides of the machine, hunger 3/5
PM SNACK: 7pm, small piece of medium alpine raw milk cheese, hunger 4/5
Got this at the farmer's market the day before, already Betsy has torn through most of it.
DINNER: 8:15pm, homemade pizza with roasted garlic, mushrooms, cipollini onions, buff moz and parm, 1/3 of a homemade calzone, homemade apple crumble and homemade chocolate gelato, hunger 4/5
Pizzas came out best yet, would of been very pleased if they were served to me in a restaurant. Used left over dough and ingredients and experimented with a calzone, also pretty good. Dessert, not so great, but the gelato was still a little better than the last time.
Felt depressed today. Starting to assemble a game plan for the future, unspoken but in my mind. Felt a little crappy from eating crap yesterday, didn't make the same mistake today.
BREAKFAST: 7am, good yogurt with raw cashews, hunger 4/5
AM SNACK: 8:30am, about 1 ounce of good chocolate, some gelato custard, hunger 4/5
Cooking chocolate gelato custard, some jumped up and pounced on me, forcing itself down my throat.
BREAKFAST 2: 10:30am, veggie burger with home fries, hunger 4/5
At Kate's Joint with the HVS. It was nice spending a nice quiet morning with someone to commiserate about whats happened at work and feel good about life in general at the same time, appreciate the friends you got despite the bad stuff. We went for a beginner's vinyassa class together after, was actually surprisingly rewarding - not too easy and not too hard. Gotta travel next weekend, but this is something I could do again.
LUNCH: 2:45pm, falafel and eggplant on whole wheat pita, hunger 4/5
PM SNACK: 4:30, some gelato custard, frozen and stuck to the sides of the machine, hunger 3/5
PM SNACK: 7pm, small piece of medium alpine raw milk cheese, hunger 4/5
Got this at the farmer's market the day before, already Betsy has torn through most of it.
DINNER: 8:15pm, homemade pizza with roasted garlic, mushrooms, cipollini onions, buff moz and parm, 1/3 of a homemade calzone, homemade apple crumble and homemade chocolate gelato, hunger 4/5
Pizzas came out best yet, would of been very pleased if they were served to me in a restaurant. Used left over dough and ingredients and experimented with a calzone, also pretty good. Dessert, not so great, but the gelato was still a little better than the last time.
Wednesday, November 28
Dr. Wildman, and his son, Chef Wildman
ADDENDA:
Last night's knife-skills class was a revelation. All very hands on, a good instructor. We cut vegetables of all stripe, and with some simple instruction found the whole thing to be wonderfully easy. First thing: get a sharpening device for my set of global knives. Second thing: totally rethink my salad this weekend, and consider squash & zuccinni in my stirfry & soup life. Third thing: peeling tomatoes is so easy!! Next spagetti sauce from scratch will be with farmer's market tomatoes when they are back in season.
Fourthly: I think I may want to go to chef's school. Of the 15-odd students in the class (again, me the only dude), he made several comments to me, the first was, "Have you done this before?" and said I was a natural and made it look easy (uhhh, it was easy.) Makes me want a bigger challenge. The Natural Gourmet Institute does have a program, but I don't know if I want to specialize in vegetarian/vegan cooking. I think I'll take one more hands-on class here then try one or two other schools in the New Year, to see if I really want to invest all that time and money in a degree I'll probably never earn back in a professional setting.
Forgot to pack any snacks today unfortunately, and realized because I have a social lunch tomorrow, Friday will be my only other lunch-from-home day this week. Three days a week to start next week, then.
Didn't have any sweets yesterday other than the banana and the apple, which I guess a month ago would of been a huge deal, now it feels....like I should eat like that more often. Was wound up from the class, slept well but only 6 hours and woke up hungry.
BREAKFAST: 7:30am, good pancakes from scratch, a jigger of seltzer, hunger 4/5
x
AM WATERING: 9:30am, 24 oz still
BP 9:30am: 129/89
LUNCH: 12:30pm, shrimp w/basil sauce and white rice, small salad slathered in peanut sauce, 2 tiny fried spring rolls, hunger 4/5
OK Thai food, would be interested to learn how to prepare something similar...
PM SNACK: 4pm, 3 potato samosa from Green Symphony, hunger 4/5
Slightly headachey, kinda jonesing for refined sugar. If I had an apple, it would knock that pang out. Feel in control, though. Looking forward to making ravioli from scratch for the first time tonight.
PM SNACK: 6:30pm, 3 pieces sesame tofu, hunger 4/5
Feeling peckish, dinner still needs to be made.
DINNER: 8:30pm, homemade cheese ravioli with homemade tomato sauce, hunger 4/5
Really good. Used the simplest recipe possible (ricotta, parm, egg, nutmeg, parsley, salt & pep) and it came through elegantly. Soft pillowy dumplings with just the right amount of chew. If I hadn't already made the sauce, I probably would of just used butter n' sage...
EVENING SNACK: 10pm, 1/2 serving of good yogurt with honey, vanilla, raw cashews, hunger 3/5
Really craving sugar, only desert I had in the house was frozen cookie dough. So I had this yogurt with an extra squirt of honey. Kind of a dessert, but less intense than a full on freak-out.
Last night's knife-skills class was a revelation. All very hands on, a good instructor. We cut vegetables of all stripe, and with some simple instruction found the whole thing to be wonderfully easy. First thing: get a sharpening device for my set of global knives. Second thing: totally rethink my salad this weekend, and consider squash & zuccinni in my stirfry & soup life. Third thing: peeling tomatoes is so easy!! Next spagetti sauce from scratch will be with farmer's market tomatoes when they are back in season.
Fourthly: I think I may want to go to chef's school. Of the 15-odd students in the class (again, me the only dude), he made several comments to me, the first was, "Have you done this before?" and said I was a natural and made it look easy (uhhh, it was easy.) Makes me want a bigger challenge. The Natural Gourmet Institute does have a program, but I don't know if I want to specialize in vegetarian/vegan cooking. I think I'll take one more hands-on class here then try one or two other schools in the New Year, to see if I really want to invest all that time and money in a degree I'll probably never earn back in a professional setting.
Forgot to pack any snacks today unfortunately, and realized because I have a social lunch tomorrow, Friday will be my only other lunch-from-home day this week. Three days a week to start next week, then.
Didn't have any sweets yesterday other than the banana and the apple, which I guess a month ago would of been a huge deal, now it feels....like I should eat like that more often. Was wound up from the class, slept well but only 6 hours and woke up hungry.
BREAKFAST: 7:30am, good pancakes from scratch, a jigger of seltzer, hunger 4/5
x
AM WATERING: 9:30am, 24 oz still
BP 9:30am: 129/89
LUNCH: 12:30pm, shrimp w/basil sauce and white rice, small salad slathered in peanut sauce, 2 tiny fried spring rolls, hunger 4/5
OK Thai food, would be interested to learn how to prepare something similar...
PM SNACK: 4pm, 3 potato samosa from Green Symphony, hunger 4/5
Slightly headachey, kinda jonesing for refined sugar. If I had an apple, it would knock that pang out. Feel in control, though. Looking forward to making ravioli from scratch for the first time tonight.
PM SNACK: 6:30pm, 3 pieces sesame tofu, hunger 4/5
Feeling peckish, dinner still needs to be made.
DINNER: 8:30pm, homemade cheese ravioli with homemade tomato sauce, hunger 4/5
Really good. Used the simplest recipe possible (ricotta, parm, egg, nutmeg, parsley, salt & pep) and it came through elegantly. Soft pillowy dumplings with just the right amount of chew. If I hadn't already made the sauce, I probably would of just used butter n' sage...
EVENING SNACK: 10pm, 1/2 serving of good yogurt with honey, vanilla, raw cashews, hunger 3/5
Really craving sugar, only desert I had in the house was frozen cookie dough. So I had this yogurt with an extra squirt of honey. Kind of a dessert, but less intense than a full on freak-out.
Friday, November 23
Gobble Gobble, Yo
ADDENDA:
Thanksgiving in Andover, a suburb of Boston, this year is the first time in my life I've spent this holiday away from my hometown, NYC. Though I guess I should of saw it coming a million miles away, I'm missing my parents horribly today.
Different wings of the extended family took different holidays, and our wing was Thanksgiving. This was the only time of year my mom would 'cook', and by cook I mean coordinate. My dad would be responsible for the turkey and the salad, my mom would put the potatoes in the oven to bake, I would be responsible for the stuffing. My mom would make a big deal about how I 'made' the stuffing, but in reality it was from a box of Stouffers. I remember one year I suggested we actually stuff the turkey with it before cooking, I think the level of complexity it entailed was beyond the pale for my mom. My Brazilian uncle would bring really good homemade chocolate mouse, a trendy thing in the 70s. Aunts would bring booze and other pies. My mom could NOT go to sleep unless ALL the dishes were washed and set up to air-dry. The house (and in later years the apartment) was always full of people on Thanksgiving, and it was always a home-cooked meal. My mom would buy the turkey at least a week in advance, the table would be set at least 48 hours in advance, the nervous tension she had the day of, hours before anyone were to come and the entire home was scrubbed clean and there was just nothing left to do other than lie down and watch TV.
I look forward to the day of regularly hosting a holiday in my home with family and friends, with homemade food and days of preparation.
BREAKFAST: 7:30am, good yogurt with honey, vanilla, raw nuts, hunger 3/5
AM SNACK: 10:30am, veggie booty, liter of seltzer, hunger 4/5
Train to Boston.
AM SNACK: 11:30am, saltless whole wheat pretzels, hunger 4/5
PM SNACK: 12:30pm, bag of potato chips, hunger 4/5
PM SNACK: 3pm, toated chiabatta bread with bruchetta stuff, hunger 4/5
DINNER: 4pm, squash maple soup, grape sorbet, turkey medallions with apple cranberry stuffing, whipped potato croquet, steamed carrots, lots of bread & butter, pumpkin creme brulee, water, hunger 4/5
Formal dinner at the very white, WASPy New England Andover Inn.
EVENING SNACK: 7:30pm, popcorn, hunger 3/5
A Thankgiving evening movie out, a first for me.
Thanksgiving in Andover, a suburb of Boston, this year is the first time in my life I've spent this holiday away from my hometown, NYC. Though I guess I should of saw it coming a million miles away, I'm missing my parents horribly today.
Different wings of the extended family took different holidays, and our wing was Thanksgiving. This was the only time of year my mom would 'cook', and by cook I mean coordinate. My dad would be responsible for the turkey and the salad, my mom would put the potatoes in the oven to bake, I would be responsible for the stuffing. My mom would make a big deal about how I 'made' the stuffing, but in reality it was from a box of Stouffers. I remember one year I suggested we actually stuff the turkey with it before cooking, I think the level of complexity it entailed was beyond the pale for my mom. My Brazilian uncle would bring really good homemade chocolate mouse, a trendy thing in the 70s. Aunts would bring booze and other pies. My mom could NOT go to sleep unless ALL the dishes were washed and set up to air-dry. The house (and in later years the apartment) was always full of people on Thanksgiving, and it was always a home-cooked meal. My mom would buy the turkey at least a week in advance, the table would be set at least 48 hours in advance, the nervous tension she had the day of, hours before anyone were to come and the entire home was scrubbed clean and there was just nothing left to do other than lie down and watch TV.
I look forward to the day of regularly hosting a holiday in my home with family and friends, with homemade food and days of preparation.
BREAKFAST: 7:30am, good yogurt with honey, vanilla, raw nuts, hunger 3/5
AM SNACK: 10:30am, veggie booty, liter of seltzer, hunger 4/5
Train to Boston.
AM SNACK: 11:30am, saltless whole wheat pretzels, hunger 4/5
PM SNACK: 12:30pm, bag of potato chips, hunger 4/5
PM SNACK: 3pm, toated chiabatta bread with bruchetta stuff, hunger 4/5
DINNER: 4pm, squash maple soup, grape sorbet, turkey medallions with apple cranberry stuffing, whipped potato croquet, steamed carrots, lots of bread & butter, pumpkin creme brulee, water, hunger 4/5
Formal dinner at the very white, WASPy New England Andover Inn.
EVENING SNACK: 7:30pm, popcorn, hunger 3/5
A Thankgiving evening movie out, a first for me.
Wednesday, November 21
Dessert-Fast Conclusion: My Foundation Assumptions are Questioned
ADDENDA:
Last night with Ilsa, we spoke of my dessert fast. I realized somethings as I was saying it: what I learned kinda bugged me.
I'm NOT addicted to sugar. It's NOT a physical thing. It's REALLY in my head.
My habits have been created by two things: my environment and my personal choices. As a fully developed non-impaired human, I have a degree of power over my environment and a GREAT deal of power over my choices. Abdicating my power to 'addiction' was a massive cop-out. This is something I always felt was a major character flaw of a very close friend....
On a rambling side-note, I have/had a friend who for the sake of anonymity we'll call Lillian. I've known Lill since we were 18 yrs old, and over the years she's suffered all sorts of trials and tribulations due to her ADHD, obsessive-compulsive disorder and a host of other things I can't fully recall. She has been on all sorts of medications over the years. She's had good years, she's had bad years.
Recently, partly due to her issues, partly due to the passing of time, partly due to the situations our lives have given us of late, she (from my perspective) had a record bad year lately. I'm actually concerned for her safety and well-being, and have come to the conclusion that our relationship actually threatens her health. Anyway, the reason I bring this up is that I was always under the impression that a lot of her issues stemmed from poor choices she made. A lot of the difficulties which she claimed were due to her illnesses seemed to be self-indulgences rather than symptoms. As she has gone from cute-crazy to crazy-crazy in recent months, I wonder if she really was crazy-crazy all these years, or did the habits that emerged from her self-indulgences (and justified by being 'crazy') actually lead her to this point? After being so certain of the later for so long, now I really don't know.
Why this talk of Lill? I guess because it comes to the point of addiction versus choice, being actually crazy verses choosing to be 'crazy' to get your way and indulge yourself. If I continue to choose to be addicted to my indulgences for sweets, I eventually (like my father before me) will get sick with diabetes and all that stuff.
Last night's chocolate consumption, a part of bar while I actively cooked with the rest, seemed positive - engaging my senses while I focused on the task at hand. But I indulged myself - I couldn't stand that there was some left over. If I didn't finish it, it would seem incomplete. Unfortunately, it was a big enough portion. eaten late enough, to keep me up past my bedtime. This defies common sense!! I didn't eat it because of addiction, I ate it because I was indulging myself, choosing not to express self-control. If I'm ever going to seriously lose a little weight and keep it off, these lines have to be exposed for what they are. Why didn't I just wrap up a left over portion and save it for a more convenient (non-sleep) time? Maybe now that I know the devil's face, I can recognize him before he fools me into committing self-harm...
BREAKFAST: 8am, good yogurt with honey, vanilla, raw nuts, small serving of fresh chocolate gelato, hunger 3/5
Put the custard into the icecream making device, and it came out incredibly thick, creamy, chocolatey. Once I scraped as much as I could into a container for the freezer, I tasted it....oof, that was a mistake. I immediately ran to B with the chocolatey spoon, who was not enthused to try something so brown n' chunky looking while preening in the bathroom. I gotta say, even though this was my first attempt and messed up on some of the ingredients, even though the total price came to maybe $15/pint, even though the prep time was more than 24 hours, it's STILL yummier than the best gelato I was eating before the dessert fast.
AM WATERING: 10:30am, 24 oz still
BP 10:45am: 135/89
Though high, I'm a little happy it is because I kind of felt that it would be - a lot on my mind, still feel the sugar of the morning in me, feeling the end of my sickness squeaking out.
LUNCH: 2pm, large bowl of veggie booty, apple, hunger 3/5
DINNER: 6pm, small salad, about one pizza's worth of random pizzas, 1 piece chocolate tofu pie, large serving chocolate gelato, 3 glasses of wine & presecco, hunger 4/5
Friends over for a parade of pizza, was fun but due to a cheap-ass pizza stone malfunction, could only do one pie at a time and spent too much time in the kitchen. Pizzas not as good as they could of been due to rushing through the rolling of the dough. Tofu pie was too dry and dense, and the gelato was not aerated enough, probably due to not enough yokes and putting it all the in the icecream making machine at once rather than doing it in batches. Next time will be much better.
Last night with Ilsa, we spoke of my dessert fast. I realized somethings as I was saying it: what I learned kinda bugged me.
I'm NOT addicted to sugar. It's NOT a physical thing. It's REALLY in my head.
My habits have been created by two things: my environment and my personal choices. As a fully developed non-impaired human, I have a degree of power over my environment and a GREAT deal of power over my choices. Abdicating my power to 'addiction' was a massive cop-out. This is something I always felt was a major character flaw of a very close friend....
On a rambling side-note, I have/had a friend who for the sake of anonymity we'll call Lillian. I've known Lill since we were 18 yrs old, and over the years she's suffered all sorts of trials and tribulations due to her ADHD, obsessive-compulsive disorder and a host of other things I can't fully recall. She has been on all sorts of medications over the years. She's had good years, she's had bad years.
Recently, partly due to her issues, partly due to the passing of time, partly due to the situations our lives have given us of late, she (from my perspective) had a record bad year lately. I'm actually concerned for her safety and well-being, and have come to the conclusion that our relationship actually threatens her health. Anyway, the reason I bring this up is that I was always under the impression that a lot of her issues stemmed from poor choices she made. A lot of the difficulties which she claimed were due to her illnesses seemed to be self-indulgences rather than symptoms. As she has gone from cute-crazy to crazy-crazy in recent months, I wonder if she really was crazy-crazy all these years, or did the habits that emerged from her self-indulgences (and justified by being 'crazy') actually lead her to this point? After being so certain of the later for so long, now I really don't know.
Why this talk of Lill? I guess because it comes to the point of addiction versus choice, being actually crazy verses choosing to be 'crazy' to get your way and indulge yourself. If I continue to choose to be addicted to my indulgences for sweets, I eventually (like my father before me) will get sick with diabetes and all that stuff.
Last night's chocolate consumption, a part of bar while I actively cooked with the rest, seemed positive - engaging my senses while I focused on the task at hand. But I indulged myself - I couldn't stand that there was some left over. If I didn't finish it, it would seem incomplete. Unfortunately, it was a big enough portion. eaten late enough, to keep me up past my bedtime. This defies common sense!! I didn't eat it because of addiction, I ate it because I was indulging myself, choosing not to express self-control. If I'm ever going to seriously lose a little weight and keep it off, these lines have to be exposed for what they are. Why didn't I just wrap up a left over portion and save it for a more convenient (non-sleep) time? Maybe now that I know the devil's face, I can recognize him before he fools me into committing self-harm...
BREAKFAST: 8am, good yogurt with honey, vanilla, raw nuts, small serving of fresh chocolate gelato, hunger 3/5
Put the custard into the icecream making device, and it came out incredibly thick, creamy, chocolatey. Once I scraped as much as I could into a container for the freezer, I tasted it....oof, that was a mistake. I immediately ran to B with the chocolatey spoon, who was not enthused to try something so brown n' chunky looking while preening in the bathroom. I gotta say, even though this was my first attempt and messed up on some of the ingredients, even though the total price came to maybe $15/pint, even though the prep time was more than 24 hours, it's STILL yummier than the best gelato I was eating before the dessert fast.
AM WATERING: 10:30am, 24 oz still
BP 10:45am: 135/89
Though high, I'm a little happy it is because I kind of felt that it would be - a lot on my mind, still feel the sugar of the morning in me, feeling the end of my sickness squeaking out.
LUNCH: 2pm, large bowl of veggie booty, apple, hunger 3/5
DINNER: 6pm, small salad, about one pizza's worth of random pizzas, 1 piece chocolate tofu pie, large serving chocolate gelato, 3 glasses of wine & presecco, hunger 4/5
Friends over for a parade of pizza, was fun but due to a cheap-ass pizza stone malfunction, could only do one pie at a time and spent too much time in the kitchen. Pizzas not as good as they could of been due to rushing through the rolling of the dough. Tofu pie was too dry and dense, and the gelato was not aerated enough, probably due to not enough yokes and putting it all the in the icecream making machine at once rather than doing it in batches. Next time will be much better.
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